A slim weist

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Show 34 Comments


  1. Lee

    Triumph the Wonder Dog is looking for a girlfriend, eh? And apparently, he’s looking for someone who meditates which explains him wanting the person to om if they’re interested.

  2. Da Popster

    Sounds like a redneck advert for a wife to me ………….. :wtf: :puke:

  3. Spud

    Why is 29 crossed out, then written?

    I’ll bet a pound to a penny he is highly successful in his search to further populate the world with his worthy offspring.


  4. Extra whiteness of the eyes? Is this guy looking for zombies? :puke:

  5. Anna

    I would qualify (the weist and whitenes of eyes) except for the age …… Any other guy interested dispite the age? Plz contact me!
    Desperate Dutchie

  6. Although it’s a shame this guy has gonads, at least he doesn’t have Internet access. Otherwise, this notice would be on Craiglist.

    The real question is, if you could only choose between this guy and any of the people behind the “Jesus the Monster Truck” page to date your daughter, which one would you pick? I’d have to say “Take my chances with the ad guy.”

  7. I think he is looking for a zombie girlfriend. Everyone knows that Zombies can’t spell.

  8. De Layna B

    Wow, maybe he is looking for “more whiteness of the eyes so she can’t tell he can’t spell while he’s holding on to her slim weist doing her, her eyes are rolled back in her head. 🙄

  9. I wish the phone number was visible. I would love to hear Dave interview this guy. 😀

  10. Knkangaroo

    Ok, guess I am missing something? What does his astrological sign have to do with being mixed black and white? Not to mention, if race isn’t important, then why mention it? Oh yeah, he made MY socks roll up and down……….

  11. sam

    Um – perhaps Baby Joe wrote the advertisement? :wtf:. That video has scarred me (further) for life! I am SOOOOO glad I was ‘fixed’ I will never have a child like that!!!! ❗

  12. Bigwavdave

    As this quaint missive is written on a deposit envelope and the syntax is rather unusual, I believe Mr. Om is a Nigerian Prince who is actually looking for someone with a bank account into which he can temporarily deposit millions of $$$. As a return favor, he will leave a large amount for the lucky girl to do with as she will. All he needs is…Well, you know the rest… 👿 👿 👿

  13. People with perfect spelling and grammar need not apply.

    God, he must be pretty desperate, he stapled it to a telephone pole.

  14. MJaz

    Well.. he must have a jingle in his pocket. Note the subtle unsaid message? He knows what a bank is!!

    I suspect this was really a bank robbery note gone ADHD. He couldn’t remember how to spell “gimmee all yer munny or I will shoot yu wif muh fingah here under dis gen-uuuu-ine Starter Jacket”… so he decided to find a sugah mama instead.

  15. Infernos

    Please tell me this was posted on a bulletin board in a trailer park, and not on a WAMU ATM…. I’m going to have to close my account otherwise. :wtf:

  16. mikeB

    “and it was through that very note, stapled haphazardly to a telephone pole, that Dave hooked up with Natalie these many years ago.”

  17. Bigwavdave

    [Comment ID #81679 will be quoted here]

    I suppose that’s right. BTW – I don’t believe that is a legit area code either. I wonder what a Sagittarius / White / Black mix looks like. Would that be a 1/2 man, 1/2 zebra archer?

  18. Drusky

    [Comment ID #81684 will be quoted here]


    😆 😀 😆

  19. [Comment ID #81684 will be quoted here]

    Mikeb is on a roll this week.

  20. Drusky

    Hey, cut the guy SOME slack… He coulda used a B of A deposit slip… 😈

    On a telephone pole with the garage sales ads. Perfect!
    “Looky here, Ethel! Someone’s selling a used mattress for $10, another’s selling ‘lots of good stuff…’, and, doggone it, here’s a future son-in-law for our little Wynona…” 😆

  21. cronewynd

    Wow, Jesus the monster truck was apparently created by someone with a true addiciton to photoshop, huh?

    So much time on their hands… so few brain cells.

  22. cronewynd

    oh, and I can’t watch the video, it’s apparently “private,” and I’m no ones’ friend. 😕

  23. BryGuy

    hmm…must’ve stolen that from my personal ad a while ago.
    Is this for real?

  24. Flash Gordon

    You’d be surprised how successful this type ad is certain parts of Georgia.
    Particularly those areas like Cobb county that are mostly Republican.
    😛 🙄 😮 :puke: :wtf:

  25. Brad K.

    Life was difficult for Joel. While he got his GED with only 14 years of night school, his parents still mocked him. He tried to get his friends to call him ‘Triumph’, but they all still him ‘Joke’. After he asked his parents about that, Joel decided even ‘Joker’ might be better that ‘Joke, but, life was difficult.

    Joel signed up for an online game, and they assigned him the game name of ‘Triumph’, like the motorcycle his Uncle Jim used to have, before he got married to that cute little girl on the next block. Uncle Jim’s twin girls were awfully sweet, and their Momma was nice, too, especially last week when he gave Melinda a ride to the DMV for her driver’s license learner’s permit, now that she had turned 14 1/2.

    And the hug Melinda gave Joel when he dropped her at home (with her shiny new learners permit) got Joel to thinking. He wanted a girlfriend, too. So he thought about what a girl should be, and he decided that he really liked a big smile, with eyes like Aunt Melinda (even if Joel’s dad called her ‘bug eyed’), and unlike most of the girls that Joel knew, Melinda never had bloodshot eyes, or looked like she had a hangover or drug reaction. When he asked Melinda how to write his message, she pointed out that Good Grammar says to spell out numbers less than 100, and he did, and that writing the girl should be ‘old enough to bleed’ might sound rude to some, so he left that part out and used her suggestion of ‘legal’ to his step-mother’s age, and that fib about his own age. Joel just told Melinda he was 29, but he was really 42. Joel hoped Melinda wouldn’t be nad if she found out.

    Joel felt funny about signing his real name for God and maybe Momma to see, so he used that Game Name, Triumph. After he borrowed Uncle Jim’s stapler to post the message, his friends laughed about how Joel misspelled ‘um’, but they didn’t know ‘Triumph’ was really ‘Joke’, er, Joel.

    It has been a week, now, and Joel still thinks life is difficult. While he sorta hoped she would, and kinda hoped she wouldn’t, Aunt Melinda hadn’t called to be his girlfriend. So that was a relief, kind of. Joel didn’t know whether he could change diapers on the twins, or what to do with the soiled nappies. Anyway, that wasn’t a problem, probably. Joel just hope that if some lady did call to be his girl friend that she was as nice as Aunt Melinda. Joel sighed and locked the door to his room, just next to his parent’s room in the 14 foot wide trailer home, and got out the JC Penney catalog his mom had thrown out last week, and turning to the lady’s underwear section, he reached for the hidden bottle of salad oil …

  26. Knkangaroo

    [Comment ID #81696 will be quoted here] Yes, I got that too, so sad, friendless…………

  27. Ahem… finally, a new avatar. One of my newer photos. 🙂

  28. Brad K? You get full marks for that little story.

  29. pablo

    Triumph didn’y realize his big mistake until the women who answered his ad made him pay dearly for early withdrawel penalties. (Triumph, the origonal two pump chump)

  30. Wayne

    poor 29, scratch that twenty nine, year old virgin. 😛 :limp:

  31. Kira

    How sad…..maybe he can marry a long lost cousin
    or sister 🙁

  32. Gary

    Somewhere, somehow, someway, there is a female on this earth that will allow this male access into the “greater genetic pool”. And the beat goes on…..

Comments are closed