Anagram Interview: Paris Hilton

DISCLAIMER: Before you scratch your head or send me hate mail, please note that this is a fake interview. The answers were created by rearranging the letters in Paris Hilton [anagramming].

Davezilla: “First off, how do you start the week?”
Paris Hilton: “I plan or shit.”

Davezilla: “Um, Paris? What are you doing under the table? Drop something?”
Paris Hilton: “Lost hairpin.”

Davezilla: “I heard you once seduced Ralph Lauren.”
Paris Hilton: “I sit on Ralph.”

Davezilla: “Assume I know nothing about hair. What is your current hairstyle called?”
Paris Hilton: “Rhino plaits.”

Davezilla: “Not that I’m interested, but what do you look for in a man?”
Paris Hilton: “A hip nostril.”

Davezilla: “Why do you keep scratching yourself down there?”
Paris Hilton: “Loin pit rash.”

Davezilla: “What was it like back home?”
Paris Hilton: “A Hilt prison.”

Davezilla: “Describe your typical evening in the NYC bar scene.”
Paris Hilton: “I nip harlots.”

Davezilla: “How do you get a taxi in New York?”
Paris Hilton: “Strip! No, hail!”

Davezilla: “What do you wear when you’re slumming it?”
Paris Hilton: “Oil pan shirt.”

Davezilla: “Describe your best friend, Nicole Ritchie.”
Paris Hilton: “Hip oral snit.”

Davezilla: “I’ve heard you are insistent that your friends refer to you as thin, not skinny?”
Paris Hilton: “Thin! Or I slap.”

Davezilla: “With a CD under your belt, would you list singer as your greatest accomplishment?”
Paris Hilton: “Ha! I list porn.”