It’s a well-established biological fact that women are the superior gender. They use both sides of their brains more often than males, live longer, can handle more pain, yada yada. For the most part, it’s clear that women are generally a lot smarter than men, too.

Except once in a while, women go all stupid on us. And when they go stupid, they tend to congregate with other women and spread the stupid around between them. It’s like a group of geniuses with projectile mental retardation.

Women, please explain yourselves.

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Show 37 Comments


  1. MJaz

    It is an automatic knee-jerk response to the outward effects of testesterone poisoning. I think it’s a survival mechanism that we are born with, to keep US from becoming victims of the same poisoning.

  2. Driver

    Dave is this how you pick fights with Natalie so you can get hot make up sex ?
    Oh and by the way Dave , I believe the stupid attacks are not real it’s just part of thier diabolical {and working} plan to frustrate and agravate men and have complete control over us , also I believe the stupid ploy is just to entertain them because they have the goodies :thong: :boob: :boob: and know thats all it really takes to control men with the exception of Richard Simmons :limp:

  3. “Except once in a while, women go all stupid on us. [….] It’s like a group of geniuses with projectile mental retardation. Women, please explain yourselves.”

    That’s because, sometimes, we try to think like the men do. You know, it’s amusing to attempt to think/behave like the other gender.

    *mew* 😈

  4. slave2oshun

    It’s in the rule book Dave. And if a man starts to figure out the rules, we HAVE to change the rules.. Just the way it is.

  5. I need more examples of this behavior before I can comment.

    What is said when they congregate with other women
    (I never hear those conversations. When they are like this It is woman code to look over at the passing male and say shhh guy.)

    Sorry my caution is an attempting to not dig a hole for my self or any other male here.

  6. Tina Marie

    Dave, Dave, Dave. You should not meddle in things too advanced for your tiny male brain. You will hurt yourself.

    And we women do not go crazy. We simply engage in frenetic ritual behaviors meant to distract men and confuse them into thinking we are stupid. Then you men will not notice, or if you do notice you will not believe, that we women are taking over the world.

    Now go back to playing with your PSP or your Gamecube or whatever it is that you call your penis. Have fun, now. 😕

  7. Klesko Fan

    If you need an explanation, you don’t need to know. Also I think you’ve only observed this phenomenon in a bar late at night.

  8. Spud

    Except once in a while, women go all stupid on us. And when they go stupid, they tend to congregate with other women and spread the stupid around between them. It’s like a group of geniuses with projectile mental retardation.

    This would be a monthly thing wouldn’t it?


  9. Da Popster

    Ir’s only a test ro see if men truly love them and are willing to put up with their BS.

  10. [Comment ID #81906 will be quoted here]

    Notice I didn’t say crazy, Tina Marie. I said stupid. I’m a priest; I cannot lie to you about such matters. 😛

  11. junkman

    i have always called this the gas/brain retention theory. it is rare to find women farting as freely as men do especially in public. this gas must go somewhere so it rises and makes it’s way to the brain. when it reaches critical mass it must be expelled fairly often. it’s like a release valve for steam. it comes out in words and ideas that are unintelligible to males. sometimes it’s quiet but deadly and sometimes it’s loud and relatively inoffensive. or vicy versy. women are far superior there is no doubt. no woman would spend time to come up with a stupid theory like this. 😐

  12. ….whereas when we men get together in groups, our neuronal activity comes to life and we immediately become intellectual giants. You girls wouldn’t believe the sophisticated arguments, cerebral jousting and witty repartee that goes on at poker games, soccer stadiums, at titty bars or wherever else us males of the species are wont to gather.

    …and if you believe that, I have a bridge to sell you.

    Naw Dave, in general, the bigger the group, the dumber they act. Look at the 2000 and 2004 elections, for cryin out loud.

  13. Knkangaroo

    A man’s best bet? Do NOT try to figure a woman out, your brain will explode. Buy her a nice gift, apologize, and go grab the remote and flip channels.

  14. Do not attempt to understand the ways of women. Just take your orders and smile.

    Sometimes the Emperor likes to dance in her ‘new clothes’.

    (Stand by with with a handycam – sell it on the net.) :boob: :boob: :thong:

  15. Bigwavdave

    Dave – Not being a woman, I shouldn’t even address this topic however I feel moved to offer you (and all men) a bit of wisdom imparted to me many years ago (regrettably, I do not remember the source): “ANY MAN WHO WISHES TO UNDERSTAND WOMEN, MUST FIRST LEARN HOW TO DRIBBLE A FOOTBALL”

  16. Buck

    Your big mistake was bothering to listen to all the chicken clucking in the first place.

  17. In regards to my first comment
    Digging holes is for fruit cake, not guys. :java:

  18. family jules

    What you assume is stupid, or mental retardation is merely a highly advanced communication style that only appears stupid to men so males won’t recognize it. This explains why the more women there are, the stupider we sound. When we have spoken plainly and been forthright with our wisdom in the past, men have burned us at stakes in the past because no superior intelligence could possibly be natural, and therefore must be witchcraft. Pardon us for avoiding that mistake twice.

    Now, we simply use a foreign language when speaking in groups around you. Have no worry, Dave. We know what we are saying.

  19. Mitch

    Often times things beyond a man’s understanding are labeled “Stupid” or “Magic”.
    Sometimes, “God” even.

    Is it possible….in this situation….That you are bound by your outdoor plumbing to be to Stupid to understand what they are saying or why?

  20. tatertot

    Dave Dave Dave… while I find your comment about projectile mental retardation incredibly entertaining… what you are witnessing is the female preparing to go into a technical meeting that is predominanently over loaded with testosterone. The women are actually discussing how to tuck their balls up comfortably in their panties in order to deal with the men messing up their meetings.


  21. sledge

    once in a while women go crazy because they have too many of your mistakes and arguments stored up in their minds for the last 20 years.These will come out of nowhere at the first sign of her PMS.

  22. I could explain it to you, but then I’d have to kill you. :kiss:

  23. franklito

    I beleive women are crazy period, but i love all of yall. your crazy in bed in the mornin at night even in your sleep, and when that time of the month comes, oh hell look out 👿 👿 they will tear you a new one for leavin the seat up. But i understand that it is the womans need to feel appreciated. Women know if a man doesnt appreciate her he will leave the first sign of this craziness. but they know if a man would put up with her moods and just plain out stupidity then he must love her(or is real desperate) so all us men who put up with the most abusive and crazy females that show us the love when needed. i have to say our women are the bomb, the most beautiful and sexy crazy bitches in the world. and we wouldnt have them any other way(but sane). ok see ya. 🙄 :wtf: 😛

  24. Honestly? I don’t understand women either.

  25. Mandy

    It doesn’t matter how stupid we act, Dave darling. We have the pussy and you want it. We can act any way we want. :kiss:

  26. mikeme

    Typical female response!! 😀

  27. Knkangaroo

    [Comment ID #81958 will be quoted here]
    Ok, I HAVE to respond, if you have never taken a bath in the toilet bowl at 3 in the morning, you don’t have a clue, PMSing has NOTHING to do with it, try GERMS, NASTY, COLD, WET, and just purely annoying………

  28. Flash Gordon

    My uncle Elmer (the one who waves his penis) says if women didn’t have
    pussies there would be a bounty on them. 😈 :wang: :wang: 🙄 :wtf:

  29. Flash Gordon

    My uncle Elmer (the one who waves his penis) says if women didn’t have
    pussies there would be a bounty on them. 😈 👿 :wang: :wang: 🙄 :wtf:

  30. franklito, you points for that post.
    I agree with you entirely. Relationships are reciprocal (meaning both ways). If it is one-sided in any way it won’t work in the long run. And there is give and take in all areas.

    Be loving and supportive and you just might get it back 10 fold. Put up with some bad, but if it is too much then something is wrong. The same can be said of both sides. Good in bed and good in life there has to be balance there too. Most people spend .01% of your entire life actually having sex but think about it for most of the time. Sex is important but real life is important too. Better to be kindhearted if you can and you may get it back. As for PMS. It is hormonal and biology and you can’t change it. It affects each woman differently. That means we have to just deal with it. It is just a bad storm that passes.

    Sorry too serious 🙂 :java:

  31. Stevie C

    [Comment ID #81963 will be quoted here]

    Women are nuts.

    Men are bolts; women are nuts.

  32. cbatdux

    [Comment ID #81912 will be quoted here]

    You are a brave man…..

  33. cbatdux

    [Comment ID #81963 will be quoted here]

    ’nuff sed. I am speechless. (that’s how they like us).

    I work. My wife plays tennis.
    I pay bills. my wife shops.
    I rake the yard. My wife orders pizza for dinner.
    I shovel snow. My wife turns the thermostat up.

    So, who’s stupid?

  34. Spud

    [Comment ID #81986 will be quoted here]

    …and they make us feel unworthy at the same time

    now that’s some kind of clever…

  35. Timm

    Question: Why do husbands often die before their wives?

    Answer: Because they want to.

  36. It’s archaeology, or maybe paleontology. Whatever. We get together with the finds from our digs and compare. When we realize that in general we’re dealing with a bunch whose frontal lobes easily fit into an XXS athletic cup we despair and start drinking large glasses of oaky Chardonnay and then it’s all over. Plus, we turn off our humor when we know it will be used against us (ie: she’s a good egg, I think I’ll just keep beating her).

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