Spotted one of the most unusual freaks this evening. A tall man, chinless and withered. Think Galapagos Tortoise in trendy evening wear. Not that trendy was any indication of taste.

Turtle Boy was probably 170 years old, judging by the remaining tufts of white hair, which encirlced his stone-shaped head like a Sumo wrestler’s Mawashi. I’ve never seen anyone wear such an unlikely combination. A black suede blazer (two sizes too large), crushed velvet, purple cargo pants (10″ too long) and endurance running shoes.

Top all that off with glasses that magnified his pupils till they resembled hockey pucks and you have Turtleneck.

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  1. Esther

    Where was this rare sighting, Dave? You didn’t try to approach it, did you? Because I hear that tortoises have a wicked bite.

  2. In Chinese, 龟头 (turtle’s head) is used to referring to the penis’ head. It is because an uncircumsized penis head looks similar to when a turtle is stretching its head.

    It is also a great insult word. Ok everyone say it with me now:

    “Gui Tou”, “Gui Tou”. Very good. Hey you, Davezilla, you weren’t paying attention! I am going to give you detention after school so you can clean your own Gui Tou!!!

  3. TinaMarie

    All together now:

    “Turtle, turtle, turtle!”

    I guess it’s only funny if you have two children who make you watch movies like Master of Disguise over and over and over and over…:dead:

  4. Mawashi? Is that what you call that thing Sumo wrestlers wear?

    It doesn’t look very sanitary.

    Why don’t they clean the thing their own selves instead of having Ma washi? :wtf:

    There are some things a mother shouldn’t touch.


  5. Kirk

    giggle, giggle….Dave said “head”….giggle giggle

    p.s.- crushed velvet purple cargo pants sound cool!

  6. crushed velvet purple cargo pants sound cool!
    I can see a lot of younger rockstar types pulling off wearing them, but on someone his age, it looked ridiculous. 🙄

  7. frisko

    I hope Mr. Style didn’t attempt to talk to you, like he knew you. Maybe he had a thong on too.

  8. JFLY

    Old-aged Mutant Pimpin’ Turtles…

    My favorite cartoon!

  9. Anna

    Oi, I think I’m in love!!!!

Comments are closed