Blogging Tips for Beginners

20 April, 2009Posted inObservations19 Comments
A lot of people write me and ask me how to make their blog as ground-shakingly popular like this one. Are there any magic formulas for winning blog content? You bet there are! Here are some simple Google searches to perform that will give you content for years to come. Simply combine two words that are not normally seen in close proximity to one another, enter into Google Images and the search results will give you the basis for many meaningful, influential posts! One exception: Pants may be combined with any other word. awesome unicorn squirrel workout uncomfortable pants [MNSFW]…

Unusual Uses for Hot Towels

16 April, 2009Posted inObservations, wtf18 Comments
If you sit in first class on a Delta or Northwest flight, you will be given a hot towel shortly before a meal is served. I was always told that hot towels were to cleanse the hands prior to eating. Other people I have sat next to on various flights have had different ideas on what the towels were meant for. Polishing shoes Draped over the face as one would do prior to a barber's shave Rubbing the breasts Folded up and tucked into the purse. Still wet. Cleaning ears Wiping down the armrests and seatback (probably not a bad…

More people we can safely dislike #20

14 April, 2009Posted inObservations18 Comments
Kids that dropped out of school because, "My teachah's ignernt." Clowns. Always clowns. Douchebags that tell their girlfriends they can't hang out with their guy friends, but they of course can continue to hang out with their ex-girlfriends. People with shit taste in films who insist that despite the critics, despite what my friends have said, despite the awful trailers that I'm really missing out on the depth of Pauly Shore's venerable acting career. Anyone who defends Coldplay. People who act affronted that they can't carry automatic weapons with them into Wal-Mart. The Illuminati. I mean, what good are they…