Fun with Shopping Carts
Owing to some past-life, seventh generation Irish curse, I have been destined to tarry on this earth forever branded as the poor soul with the squeaky shopping cart. It never…
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The Collect Call of Cthulhu
Yoggy Yog: Yo man, pick up the phone. Pick up the phooooone, bitch. … C'mon, you squid-lookin' muthafuckah. Pick up the damn phone! Operator: Collect call from … Snoop Yoggy…
Definition of an Asshole
How do we know for a fact that he's an asshole? Look at the damning evidence: He's parked in a no-parking zone. He's parked half on the curb. He drives…
Don’t suck
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My money’s on the bird
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Notes to self: 4,705-4,709
Do not rub eyes after using the kitchen sponge. Do not look at the hot secretary while walking towards the heavy glass door. Check your zipper before meeting new clients.…
Blame it on Rhea
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Overheard: Victoria’s Secret Edition
I went to Victoria's Secret with my friend Lisa on Saturday. Long story. Cut to the chase. VS is a pretty good place to hear some interesting conversations. Mother: I…
Thinking outloud
Do you think there are any hot babes along the International Date Line? Is it possible to truly have civil disobedience? I buy plenty of finger food, but my hands…
You get what you pay for
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“No, George! That’s not what I meant…”
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