Worst things to do in a library

Using epoxy or Velcro, affix dozens of books all over yourself. Run through the library screaming Feign lycanthropy Ask loudly where the erotica section is Bring a webcam, hook it up to a public computer and do a striptease Sprinkle sneezing powder on all the reference books Ask the librarian if the copy machine will support a grown wo/man sitting on it Bring a skateboard. Do a 50/50 Grind off the religious book section Replace the contents of the card catalog with Rolodex cards from someone's office Release the manatees! See the Video of the Day for more viagra free…

Fake foods that should not be

Spray Cheese Canned Sausage. The power of Christ compels you! Boxed Wine. Wrong, wrong wrong. Squeeze Mayo and Margarine Spray Cooking Oils Goober Tofurkey Mac & Cheese Loaf. Makes the Baby Jesus cry. Instant Mashed Potatoes. Come on. How lazy can you be? What fake foods freak you out? Guest author: Natalieviagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra…

Complete this Sentence, #34

"That's the last time I take a vacation to __________ with a couple o' __________ ."viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy generic viagra cheap viagra uk generic viagra online try viagra for free generic viagra from india fda approves viagra free viagra…

2007 New Years Resolutions

Longtime readers of this site will know that I always post my resolutions and that I try to only make resolutions I know I can keep. Such as not reverting to cannibalism. I'd love to hear yours. I resolve to freely give the finger to clowns, mimes and Hummer drivers I resolve to openly point out those who still wear miniskirts with Uggs or prison pants I resolve that I will never hunt down and/or kill a coworker I resolve to never appear on an episode of COPS I resolve to have ten fingers all year I resolve to have…

Inventions I’d like to see

They can make copiers that can run 500 documents at 120 pages per minute, so why can't they make a vending machine that accepts a wrinkly dollar bill? Can we make microwaves that read the barcodes on microwave popcorn and reset their own timers so they don't burn when idiot coworkers set them for 13 minutes? If they can make cold medicine that lasts 24 hours, why can't they make toothpaste that keeps my teeth clean for an entire day? Why isn't there toothpaste that tastes great after orange juice? Screw those heat packs for camping. How about socks that…

Time off for good behavior

OK kids, I am off to the wilds of Canada for a few days. I really need it. Have a great holiday! The humor will resume on Thursday, December 28th. Please leave your peculiar aristocratic titles (see today's link) in the comments!viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free…

Why?

It's a well-established biological fact that women are the superior gender. They use both sides of their brains more often than males, live longer, can handle more pain, yada yada. For the most part, it's clear that women are generally a lot smarter than men, too. Except once in a while, women go all stupid on us. And when they go stupid, they tend to congregate with other women and spread the stupid around between them. It's like a group of geniuses with projectile mental retardation. Women, please explain yourselves.viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra…

Worst things to find in your Xmas stocking

Apple sauce A human head Last year's fruitcake Scoliosis TEH crab A porcupine Rumfeld's still beating heart Global Warming Jacko's prosthetic nose tip What don't you want to find in your stocking? viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy generic viagra cheap viagra…

Title this album, #1

viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy generic viagra cheap viagra uk generic viagra online try viagra for free generic viagra from india fda approves viagra free viagra sample what is better viagra or levitra discount generic viagra online viagra cialis levitra viagra…

You will never be this cool

Link via Larfusviagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy generic viagra cheap viagra uk generic viagra online try viagra for free generic viagra from india fda approves viagra free viagra sample what is better viagra or levitra discount generic viagra online viagra cialis…