Observations

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Waiter: "Well you certainly did a good job. That burrito was huge! I can't believe you ate all of it." Old lady: "I'm 90, young man. I have eaten hundreds of men under the table in my time." Waiter: [suppressing laughter] "TMI!"viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free…

Irish Werewolf Hound Deep Sea Water Spaniel Van Helsing Terrier Doberman Butt Pincher Sex Toy Poodle Cocktail Spaniel Russian Yeti Hound Jerry Springer Spaniel Car Jack Russell What breeds would you like to see? With assistance from the lovely Natalieviagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples…

Natalie and I were discussing how every decent sized city has certain businesses with the same name, that are not franchises. No matter where you go (at least in the North American continent), you are likely to find these. Please add any I’ve missed, particularly ones outside this continent. A night club called Asylum or Sanctuary A First Baptist Church (unless you consider Baptists to be a franchise) A Chicken Shack An unexpected place to find live bait (Ex. Milly’s Ice Cream and Bait Shop) A fake Irish pub run by Italians A sports bar called Woody’s. Inevitably, it will…

As made up by Davezilla Aries: Your enthusiasm and boundless energy will be appreciated at work, especially during that important meeting. That is, until you get the church giggles and wet your pants. Taurus: Taureans prefer to take things slow and steady. Today’s continued heat-wave will see you falling asleep shortly after touching yourself to naughty pictures. The janitor reports you to HR. Gemini: You will finally get that letter you’ve long been waiting for: the RIAA is indeed suing you for downloading illegal MP3s. Cancer: Mommy sends you new PJs with duckies and flowers on them. You wonder if…

Of late I have been ordering iced black tea, mixed with lemonade at Starbucks. One day, the cashier yells to the barista, "An Arnold Palmer. Venti," to which the barista repsonded, "What the hell is that?" "Well that's the name of that drink. We call them that at the other store." That got me to thinking. Wouldn't it be fun to make up all manner of drinks and claim that, "I dunno. All the other Starbucks make it." Some suggestions. Be sure to add your own. The Lily Tomlin Rasberry Broken Refrigerator A Sarah Silverman Paris in Jail, with soy…

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Doesn't it seem like certain foods, fruits in particular, have a class association with them? Here's what I mean by that: Apples: A good, standard fruit, The working man's fruit. Apples appeal to the common man as well as to ideals, possibly owing to their dubious Biblical connections in Genesis. A damn fine fruit. Avacadoes: A total chick fruit. Avacadoes can only be eaten by males if hidden under the manly name "guacamole". Otherwise, this fruit just screams middle class estrogen. Bananas: The poor banana. Relegated to a lower class existence of crude, frat boy jokes and slapstick humor. Kumquats:…

In all likelihood, the BMW-owning yuppie fucktard that ordered this plate meant it to imply SLEEP WITH ME. But is that really what he meant? I can think of a few other translations and I'm sure you can, too. SLeeP WiTh MainE SLaP WhiTe MicE ScaLloPs With TiME Sea Lions Pay Willingly To Mount Emus What are your suggestions? Photo taken by the ever-vigilant Kenviagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra…

"Is that your wife? Does she know you've been sacked?" "Oh yeah, baby! Do it to me like you did in prison. That's it! Right there." "Hey, get off that phone! We got more work to do. This bank ain't gonna rob itself!" "Dude is that, my wife's lingerie you're wearing?" "Oh my God! You just peed on my carpet! What is wrong with you?" "Go ahead and call! This changes nothing! You're still going to jail." "Don't ignore me, you son of a bitch. Get off dat phone. Vinnie wants his money now!" "Hey! You're on in 5. Quit…