Friday Saturday Question
Apologies for the few posts of late. I am traveling so much that I rarely get quality Inter Webs time anymore. What's your most most embarrassing moment? C'mon. Out with it.
Unusual Uses for Hot Towels
If you sit in first class on a Delta or Northwest flight, you will be given a hot towel shortly before a meal is served. I was always told that hot towels were to cleanse the hands prior to eating. Other people I have sat next to on various flights have had different ideas on what the towels were meant for. Polishing shoes Draped over the face as one would do prior to a barber's shave Rubbing the breasts Folded up and tucked into the purse. Still wet. Cleaning ears Wiping down the armrests and seatback (probably not a bad…
More people we can safely dislike #20
Kids that dropped out of school because, "My teachah's ignernt." Clowns. Always clowns. Douchebags that tell their girlfriends they can't hang out with their guy friends, but they of course can continue to hang out with their ex-girlfriends. People with shit taste in films who insist that despite the critics, despite what my friends have said, despite the awful trailers that I'm really missing out on the depth of Pauly Shore's venerable acting career. Anyone who defends Coldplay. People who act affronted that they can't carry automatic weapons with them into Wal-Mart. The Illuminati. I mean, what good are they…
Friday Question #11
So if you've followed my Twiiter, Flickr or Facebook posts, you've by now heard that Lizz and I are the proud owners of a 30' sailboat. So one thing that everyone keeps asking us is what we will name the boat? On Tuesday night I had this conversation: HIM: "You gonna name your boat something cool like Sea Fag?"ME: [cough] HIM: "Well I would." What Should We Name Our New Boat?
Friday Question #10
Have you ever talked to someone whose gender you could not identify, even after a lengthy conversation?
Physical Benefits of Jobs I’ve Held
Also known as “Why I hate 4AM” Paperboy: Over-developed left shoulder, crooked spine, ink-stained fingers, anxiety from waking up at 4AM to deliver papers Tropical Fish Store Clerk: Over-developed shoulders from carrying water buckets, wrinkled fingertips, permanently soaked Adidas, anxiety from staying up till 4AM checking pH levels of marine tanks Waiter: Over-developed left shoulder and strong wrists (from carrying trays), sore feet, grimace from holding back laughter when Midwesterners mispronounced common European dishes, anxiety from staying up till 4AM with side-work Punk Band Roadie: Ability to yell “Check, two, two” into mics at earsplitting levels, smokey hair, inhuman Guinness…
TOASTER FAIL
I was all excited to have this multigrain bread till I realized it was 3" wider than the toaster slots. Epic fail.
Annoying!
I have soundtracks in my dreams. If they were cool bands, like Aphex Twin, The Bravery or Fleet Foxes, I could deal. But they aren't. They're generally annoying songs that end up being stuck in my head all the next day. Last night was tolerable (Mott the Hoople's All the Young Dudes), but it will not leave my head. Worst of all, it's the same line that keeps repeating. Here is my plea to you, dear readers. Tell me a better song so I can erase it from memory. Thank you and bless you.
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