Complete this sentence #26, Poetry Edition

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Halloween costume suggestions

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How to destroy your eyes in 7 simple steps

Get called to fly out fo state for work on a moment’s notice Stay up till 2am working on a new business pitch with your coworkers Deliver the pitch at the crack of dawn Fly home next to someone who is clearly wearing perfume as a body glaze Ensure that you get a seat on […]

Camel Toads

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Caption Time #77

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Take only what’s necessary

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Note to Self, No. 5,777

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Overheard: Cannibal Edition

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Story Problem

If Tom has three times as many testicles as Susan, and Susan has one-fourth as many ovaries as Joe, how many BBQ ribs does Mary have, if she has two more Ouija Boards than Tom?

Overheard: Knock-a-tano Edition

Woman in line at Starbucks: “May I have a tall uh, that cararmel drink?” Barista: “Macchiato?” Woman: “Knock-uh-tanno?” Barista: “Macchiato.” Woman: “Tach-uh-nano? One more time please?” Barista: [sigh] “Macchiato.” Woman: “I apologize. Those Japanese names really throw me.”

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