Month: April 2005

That Halogen high-beams have been stapled to my eyelids An Ivory Woodpecker has mistaken the left side of my head for an Elm Tree The pads on my cats’ feet have been fitted with cinder blocks The sun is now one metre from my window That all food is made of cardboard, spiced with dryer…

Terrible migraine. Can’t see. May post later … :dead: viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra…

Next time you drop buttered popcorn in a glass of Perrier by mistake, retrieve it within one second or pour the glass out. Blecch. Five second rule does not apply here. viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples…

Pugs may appear to be friendly dogs, but at night they eat babies and mints. Benjamin Franklin invented the sigh. Ronald McDonald was based on a old Scottish faery tale. In the story, Ruach McDougall, was a sabre-toothed ogre who grilled ferrets and served them between two pieces of crusty bread. Prior to the Council…

I met someone at the coffeehouse today who claimed to know me. HIM: “You do the websites, right buddy?” ME: “Yes, I do.” HIM: “Yeah, I heard about you. You do that funny site with the monkeys and clown-devil things.” ME: “Nnnnnnoooooo. That doesn’t sound like anything I’ve done.” HIM: “Don’t you that Ben Stiller…