Observations

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Picking up where a post from March, 2002 left off, Natalie and I decided to write new collective nouns for specific brands of automobiles. A hatred of Hummers An embarrassment of PT Cruisers A granola of Subarus A weeping of Saabs A tuning of Civics An ickle of Mini Coopers A swarm of VW Beetles A snobbery of BMWs An explosion of Pintos Please add your own suggestions viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects…

English Teacher Pickup Lines Care to split my infinitive? What's an antonym for virginity? That's quite a dangling modifier you've got there. I love the way you misuse the subjunctive, you naughty little minx. You always know how to find the predicate in my clause. Let me be the first to complement your subject. Show me your direct object and I'll show you mine. You can take my infinitive object; with or without actors! Tell me all about your past progressive. You certainly know how to use other tenses in conjunction with simple tenses.

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When they say, "How's the work coming along?" they really mean, "I am not missing my lunch break over you." When they say, "I'm glad you were assigned to this," they really mean, "Nobody else was stupid enough to work on this." When they say, "We need to manage the client top down," they really mean, "You're at the bottom of the pecking order and shit flows downstream." When they say, "This project will require your utmost attention," they really mean, "Don't screw this up. My review is next week." When they say, "Let's take this offline to discuss," they…

Having to take them out for walksies at midnight Finding 18"flea collars They crotch sniff your boss at the company Christmas party Finding your sex toys chewed up behind the sofa The bones buried in the backyard look human The high turnover of mailmen Knowing that the tongue was last used as toilet paper When you play tennis with them, they growl and won't give up the ball Always wondering if, "I had some friends for dinner," should be taken literally Two words: leg humping viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy…