Observations

Gentlemen, This week sees the arrest of yet another Japanese pervert; serial lingerie thief Shigeo Kodama. Kodama, a 54 year-old construction worker, stole nearly 4,000 pairs of panties in only six years. I only have a few questions, as one who has never visited Japan. What is up with Japanese men and panties? Granted, as fetishes go, it's fairly tame. It's nothing as disturbing as say, underwater clown sex, but by comparison, we Westerners grow weary of peeking at girls' underwear by age ten or so. Explain. Use extra sheets if necessary. Second, and I ask this on behalf of…

”Are the burgers locally grown? I only eat organic.” ”My water broke.” ”Your mother's in here, Karras. Would you like to leave a message? I'll see that she gets it.” ”Two fifty-six for the meal? OK, how much for a lapdance?” ”Is this the place where the rats where found in the tacos? I don’t want no rat tacos.” ”Wait. Say that again. Slower this time. Aw, yeah. That’s soooo hot.” ”This isn’t medium rare. I specifically asked for medium rare.” ”I’m from Immigration. I’m going to pull around and I don’t want any sudden moves.” Once upon a time,…

I blame the DST, of course.viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy generic viagra cheap viagra uk generic viagra online try viagra for free generic viagra from india fda approves viagra free viagra sample what is better viagra or levitra discount generic viagra…

My cat recently turned 17. That age marks a special time in a cat's life when she ascends from a Demanding Diva to a Hirsute Hobgoblin. True, she is still deceptively beautiful, in the same way many terrible vipers are. It is her mannerisms that have transcended during this special year. Socks I used to come home from travel and find a matching pair of my socks by the door. She would drag them there in hopes of bringing me back, which clearly worked. She still does this, but now adds special touches to them: hairballs, dryer lint, vomit. It…

Some interesting road trips you can make in the United States. Suggested by misterarthur. From Intercourse, Pennsylvania to Climax, Michigan From Kill Devil Hills, North Carolina to Hell, Michigan From Spread Eagle, Wisconsin to Hooker, Arkansas From Cut-Off, Louisiana to Blueballs, Pennsylvania From Cold Water, Mississippi to Hot Water, Mississippi From Toad Suck, Arkansas to Monkey's Elbow, Kentucky From Panic, Pennsylvania to Fearnot, Pennsylvania From Boring, Oregon to Eclectic, Alabama From Ogle, Kentucky to Loveladies, New Jersey From Smackover, Arkansas to Assawoman, Virginia From Muck City, Alabama to Shite Creek, Idaho From Fort Dick, California to Dickeyville, Wisconsin From Dismal,…

Barista: "She has like, an accent or something. She speaks in British." Woman on the phone near me: "I heard that if you break vitamins in half, most of the amino acids escape." Young girl on phone: "If I shave my head, will the hair ever grow back? No, I'm being serious. It will? Really?" viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to…

Every year the groundhog sees his shadow and we end up with a long winter. Can't we genetically create groundhogs with no fear?viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy generic viagra cheap viagra uk generic viagra online try viagra for free generic viagra…

viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy generic viagra cheap viagra uk generic viagra online try viagra for free generic viagra from india fda approves viagra free viagra sample what is better viagra or levitra discount generic viagra online viagra cialis levitra viagra…

Dear Visor Engineers: I am writing a letter to express my disappointment with your products. I understand that as automotive engineers go, your job is not a glamorous one. Indeed, yours is on the bottom rung of the engineering ladder, right below the windshield (windscreen) wiper engineers. That said, I think you could do better. No, I'm not trying to make the world of the visor more exciting. Don't kid yourself. You'll never play in the wind tunnels alongside the aerodynamics engineers. Nor will you get to road test with the Brake and Shock engineers. Yours is a life of…

Frog and Toad and Mortal Enemies Harriet the Spy in Guantanamo Bay Curious George throws his feces The 500 Diseases of Bartholomew Cubbins Where the Girls Gone Wild Things Are Horton Hears a Glock James and the Giant Bitch The Princess and the Period Everybody Poops. Just Not at School. Which ones did I miss? viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to…

How many fingers am I holding up?viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy generic viagra cheap viagra uk generic viagra online try viagra for free generic viagra from india fda approves viagra free viagra sample what is better viagra or levitra discount generic…