Davezilla.com

Overheard: Cannibal Edition

By Davezilla 24 October, 2005Observations27 Comments

I had to capture the speaker's visage for you, dear readers, so you may avoid this person, should your paths ever cross. Not the best photo, but it's at least recognizable. Man in photo: "I'm just sayingâ€¦ I'd eat a newborn if it came between me starving and that."viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online…

Caption Time #77

By Davezilla 23 October, 2005Caption Time30 Comments

viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy generic viagra cheap viagra uk generic viagra online try viagra for free generic viagra from india fda approves viagra free viagra sample what is better viagra or levitra discount generic viagra online viagra cialis levitra viagra…

Story Problem

By Davezilla 22 October, 2005Observations30 Comments

If Tom has three times as many testicles as Susan, and Susan has one-fourth as many ovaries as Joe, how many BBQ ribs does Mary have, if she has two more Ouija Boards than Tom?

Take only what’s necessary

By Davezilla 21 October, 2005Uncategorized38 Comments

In the event of a hurricane, take only what's necessary: Toilet Paper, Bud Light, Keystone Ice, Budweiser, Red Dog, and a piece of plywood to float the ole lady on.viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy generic viagra cheap viagra uk generic viagra…

Overheard: Knock-a-tano Edition

By Davezilla 20 October, 2005Observations51 Comments

Woman in line at Starbucks: "May I have a tall uh, that cararmel drink?" Barista: "Macchiato?" Woman: "Knock-uh-tanno?" Barista: "Macchiato." Woman: "Tach-uh-nano? One more time please?" Barista: [sigh] "Macchiato." Woman: "I apologize. Those Japanese names really throw me."

Where does the time go?

By Davezilla 19 October, 2005Observations14 Comments

We've all asked ourself the question, "Where does the time go?" I think I have the answer to that question. Look at the photo below: It's quite obvious. Troy is stealing time from the rest of us. How else could they be the city of tomorrow, today?

New Old Wives’ Tales to scare children with

By Davezilla 18 October, 2005Observations22 Comments

Seeing an ambulance is very unlucky and if you see one, it's coming to take mommy and daddy away. Forever. A bird flying in the house means you won't have a birthday this year. If you blow out all the candles on your birthday cake with the first puff you will get your wish. If you fail, all your presents will be sent to starving children in China who will eat them. If your cheeks suddenly feel on fire, someone is telling your parents that you are failing in school. It's bad luck to pick up a coin if it's…

Caption Time #76

By Davezilla 17 October, 2005Caption Time37 Comments

The Surgeon General has determined…

By Davezilla 16 October, 2005Observations21 Comments

…drinking glass cleaner will not turn you invisible …smoking toothpaste may give you minty-fresh cancer cells …shaving with expanding urethane foam will require a much longer razor What have you heard from the Surgeon General?

Usable wall color

By Davezilla 15 October, 2005Uncategorized31 Comments

Our new landlord is rather fond of shall we say, vibrant wall colors. Our new hallway colors appear to be chosen from the cover of one of Jakob Nielsen's usability books.viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy generic viagra cheap viagra uk generic…

Happy birthday, soda lover

By Davezilla 14 October, 2005Observations20 Comments

I was nine and going to my grandmother's for my birthday. I loved going to my grandmother's house. It was creaky, dark and she had children's books dating back to the 1920s. The only odd thing about her was her recipes were … unexpected, to say the least. This particular birthday, I was dropped off to spend the weekend at my grandmother's with my cousin, whose birthday was a few days before mine. She made a cake for both of us. "Do you like chocolate cake, boys?" Silly question. Of course we did. She returned with a cake with strange…

Overheard: Carpet Cleaners Edition

By Davezilla 13 October, 2005Observations26 Comments

Carpet Cleaner #1: "Dude, you ever been to Screaming Eagle Casino?" Carpet Cleaner #2: "Do you mean, Soaring Eagle?" CC #1: "Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaah, that one. I been there last week and I wasn't s'pposed to be cause I'm on probation still." CC #2: "What the Hell for? CC #1: "Oh, my ole lady turn me in cause I shit in her sock." CC #2: "The Hell. Just for that? CC #2: "Wait. This the same broad that made you a cake outta watermelon?" CC #1: "No, this is another one. Jill, man. I'll shit in her sock again tonight if she…