Year: 2007

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  • Things you probably should avoid doing at the border patrol booth

    When asked if you have food to declare, ask if human remains count. Tell the patrol official to, “kindly hurry the fuck up.” “No. You cannot look in my trunk. I just met you.” As proof of ID, supply a pact with Satan written in blood. “I’ll have a double cheeseburger and a large Coke.”…

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  • Don’t be a trobe

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  • She tooks steroids?

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  • Not dead.

    Ugh. Mucho apologies for my absence. I’ve been ill. Getting better. Writing some new posts. Up by midnight. morning Carry on without me.

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    Davezilla

  • Tribes: Over Smilers

    I hate them. The Over Smilers. They ruin photos, frighten children and cause cows to dry up with their wan expressions and lipless grimaces. First introduced to the United States in the 1950s by the Dutch, they were inbred nearly to extinction in the area now known as Glamour Shots. viagra free viagra buy viagra…

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  • Observation No. 1,036,997

    I’ve decided I really like the U-Scans at the grocery store because they still card me for beer. viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online…

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  • Tribes: Coupon Clippers

    Jason Macemore and I had lunch at a local Greek restaurant. When we left to pay, the woman in front of us was using one of those keyring discount cards. She must have had 70 different cards crushed on her keyring, like some grotesque, spiraling flower made of laminate and barcodes. This is a tribe.…

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  • Detroit bumper stickers

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