2005 | Page 2 of 30 | Davezilla.com

This will not end well

By Davezilla 19 December, 2005Uncategorized35 Comments

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1st Level Web Master Spells

By Davezilla 18 December, 2005Observations13 Comments

Protection against Comic Sans: Protects beginning Web Designers from succumbing to the fetid odor of this most noxious font. Dispel MIDI: Makes the spell caster immune to the dissonant shrieks of embedded MIDI soundtracks on personal homepages. Detect Rainbow: Spell destroys rainbow divider bars. Temporarily dispels rainbow-colored text. Mage Page: Magic spell to dispel popup ads and prevent javascript page takeovers. Obscure Animation: Prevents animated GIFs of gay Spiderman from dancing more than one round. Cursor Curse: Prevents the mouse from being followed by animated trails of stars, unicorns and flowers. Vampiric Styles: Touch removes ghastly stylesheets that only work…

Caption Time #83

By Davezilla 17 December, 2005Caption Time35 Comments

Story Problem No. 2

By Davezilla 16 December, 2005Observations20 Comments

Dog is to London Underground as trepanation is to ________ . Misery is to sophistry as sea cucumbers are to ________ . Geysers are to petting zoos as wingnuts are to ________ .

What I learned from movies, Part 1

By Davezilla 15 December, 2005Original Humor48 Comments

Women's purses only have four items in them An entire corporation's data fits on a single disk Men can unhook bras on the first try Storms and wars can be quieted when the hero has something important to say Predatory animals suffer from glaucoma and see in thermo-vision Any computer security system can be broken into with the password "override" No one gets cramped or kneed in the face during sex All monsters — even giant insects — make pig squealing sounds when shot Swipe card slots can be defeated with Bobby pins, as can most locks Pre-Roman barbarian women…

Martini garnishes to avoid

By Davezilla 14 December, 2005Observations43 Comments

Spruce needles Bacon Ramen Live guppies Dijonnaise Bullion cubes Gouda Spam Poutine Scrambled Egg Pepperoni Mice Balut Chitterlings Krab Meringue Foil a Guinea Pig Pie And your suggestion? viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy generic viagra cheap viagra uk generic viagra online…

Dairy Queen

By Davezilla 13 December, 2005Uncategorized34 Comments

Caption Time #83

By Davezilla 12 December, 2005Caption Time34 Comments

Based on an idea by reader, H. R. Gerrard, today's Caption Time will be a cartoon instead of a photo. Have at it! viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy generic viagra cheap viagra uk generic viagra online try viagra for free generic…

Meat Floss

By Davezilla 11 December, 2005Observations25 Comments

Minnie sent me an excellent book entitled "Here Speeching American", something my readers excel at. I love the Engrish shopping sections, one in particular fromâ€”where elseâ€”Japan. Door No. 1 Entrance Door No. 2 Exitrance Aisle A: Caned Fruit Aisle B: Caned Vegitarian Caned Fish Meat Caned Meat Floss "A lovely paper for your toilet life" [Toilet paper wrapping] "Be half as fresh as the day is long [Tampon slogan] Rechee Milk Flavor Chips: Use for snack, fun, panties What's the strangest label you've ever seen?viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra…

Caption Time #82

By Davezilla 10 December, 2005Caption Time31 Comments

Mr. Outback

By Davezilla 09 December, 2005Uncategorized20 Comments

Few things are more pathetic than wealthy yuppies coming into Royal Oak and trying to look hip, but instead looking like extras from Crocodile Dundee III. This fellow had suede boots which I'm certain belonged to his wife. I would have drawn her as well, but my Wacom pen was not feeling sluttish this evening. His hat was one of those Minnetonka foldable hats, except sized for his grandson. The rest is fairly self-explanatory.viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra…

The guy next to me on the plane

By Davezilla 08 December, 2005Uncategorized40 Comments

Now, I admit this is not a great sketch. The reason I like it is that I did it in full view of this man without his knowledge. He was jamming away to tunes. I assumed he had an iPod or something. Then I realized he was humming to himself and making astonishing impersonations of every instrument. It's good to be able to amuse yourself. [Alias Sketchbook, drawn on a bumpy plane ride back from Little Rock, AR.]Do check out today's link. You will not recover. Ever. P.S., the server has been suffering from constant hits from Yahoo and Inktomi's…