Honeymoon Poem. Finally, a talent equal to Tiny Tim

If you've ever had any doubts whether or not Britney Spears has any talent, let me shoot them in the foot right now, then bend those doubts over, give them a knee to the groin, pull their shirt over their head and sweep their legs. Perhaps I am being too harsh. Perhaps it is because I have been watching martial arts movies all morning. I am of course, referring to Britney's "Honeymoon Poem." It is, if I may quote George Bush, "A catastrophic success." Forget all the inane LiveJournal goth poetry you've ever begrudgingly read. This one beats them all.…

Keeping abreast of my readers #3

Yes, it seems like I’ve created a monster. Or rather, Esther and Mandy have. Readers are busting out at the chance to express themselves. Trouble is, I’m not sure how many of these are real anymore. You decide. Bobby Peru has never looked lovelier. Sorcha Myra Lori Bobby Peru mikeB viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase…

Anagram Interviews: Dick Cheney and Tony Blair

DICK CHENEY Davezilla: Was it really true that you received a ton of kickbacks from Haliburton from the Iraqi conflict? Dick Cheney: I deny check. Davezilla: Mr. Vice-President? Describe your lesbian daughter in two words. Dick Cheney: Needy chick. Davezilla: What's the secret of your unhealthy pallor? Dick Cheney: Chicken dye. Davezilla: No one seems to call you Richard. I guess you don't seem like a Richard so much as a Dick. Dick Cheney: Hence, Dicky. TONY BLAIR Davezilla: Parliament seems to have more on the ball than the US government. Why is that? Tony Blair: Brainy lot. Davezilla: Your…

Neenie Moo Moo

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Keeping abreast of my readers #2

My. Leave for Canada for a week and my readers get restless. As well as dress-less. More photo submissions from my lovely readers. Update: We have a male submission. Um, enjoy. Esther Mandy (again!) Mattis (Merth) viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy…

Caption time #25

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Note to self: 5,072

Better yet, stay in Canada (where I’ve been since Thursday).viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy generic viagra cheap viagra uk generic viagra online try viagra for free generic viagra from india fda approves viagra free viagra sample what is better viagra or…

Note to self: 5,071

Avoid gloating Republicans for the next four years.viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra prices herbal viagra alternative to viagra buy generic viagra purchase viagra online free viagra without prescription viagra attorneys free viagra samples before buying buy generic viagra cheap viagra uk generic viagra online try viagra for free generic viagra from india fda approves viagra free viagra sample what is better viagra or levitra discount…

Never feed burritos to a squid

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Rules to live by

Actual rules of thumb from around the country (and a few of my own). YMMV. The year that you begin getting chest hair is the same year the hair on your head will begin to recede faster than the growth rate. (Same rule applies to men.) — MARK RYAN, Dallas, TX Never buy a car with greater horsepower than your IQ. — SCOTT PARKER, Beaumont, TX The better the band, the worse the football team. — TOM LUCAS, Berkeley, CA If you can’t find it on a website in under five minutes, Google it or go somewhere else. — DAVEZILLA…

Caption time #24

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