Year: 2004

Protracted insurgency: No, it’s a war. Plain and simple. Deck: Yes, some sad hipsters still use this. Fab, faboo and fabs: [shudder] Calling white folk crackers. Please. The proper term is “pasty white cracker”. Misusing the word mod. Sorry, but painting your rocking chair is not “modding it”. Neither is putting a Ché Guevara patch…

Two soup issues in one week. Unfair. Next time we make boiling hot miso, avoid spilling it directly on the nether regions. viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female…

As you may have read yesterday, Blockbuster Inc. announced it is eliminating late fees on all its video tapes, DVDs and video games as of January 1st, 2005. However, customers will be given a one-week grace period to return the product. After that grace period ends, Blockbuster will automatically sell them the product, minus the…

The next time you make corn chowder, try to stay awake for the stirring process. viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side effects female viagra natural viagra online viagra cheapest viagra…

I woke up on the wrong side of the bed. I was under it. While attempting to extract myself from the boxspring’s grasp I was attacked by a band of voracious dust bunnies, that were obviously high on goofers. No quarter was I shown by the merciless ways of the marauding dust bunnies. They removed…

Wana ride my Nimbus 2000? Let me show what Slytherin really means. How’d you like to model my Cloak of Invisibility? I’ve got the biggest wand on campus, babe. I’ve just mastered levitation, honey. Wanna see something rise? I’ve done the entire Quidditch team. I’m no werewolf, but I can turn into an animal. I…

Reward their singing by pouring delicious, hot soup in their chilly hands. Offer to accompany them on the electric sitar and mouth harp. Fill snowballs with yogurt and fire away. Follow in the footsteps of our ancestors by pouring boiling oil out the window on them. Join along in the singing, allowing your Tourette Syndrome…