Month: July 2004

  • Ten things that disturb me about the Jolly Green Giant

    He wears a tattered and threadbare tunic with a brand new red scarf. Isn’t aware that green hair is so 1979. Won’t let us see what Mrs. Giant looks like. Responsible for the accidental stepping deaths of 23 American farmers each year. His urine stream causes local flooding. The Giant’s enormous fingers are the reason…

  • Betty Crocker: Hot or Not?

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  • It’s baddass with the butterfly

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  • Enough said

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  • Things we’d like to see

    It is the job of an advertising mascot to amuse us and help us remember a particular product. Unfortunately, most of them serve only to annoy the bejeezus out of us. All week I will be getting out my aggressions on the mascots we’ve come to hate. I detest the Arby’s Oven Mitt and the…

  • Roaming Gnome’s latest adventures

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  • Overheard: SPF-45 Edition

    Man No. 1: “Dude! You are so sunburnt. You’re as red as a pineapple!” Man No 2: “Pineapples are yellow?” Man No. 1: Really? I guess I never looked that closely.” viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples…

  • The origin of logotypes

    Despite their macho image, Dodge Rams are pretty girly. I am reminded of another automotive logo post from three years ago. Image courtesy Tian viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side…

  • Personality Test

    Frogs are to cannon balls what Valium is to [blank]. Snowflakes are to Australians what abject poverty is to [blank]. Large, fake breasts are to women what tooth decay is to [blank]. George W. Bush is to meatloaf what Cable TV is to [blank]. John Kerry is to salsa dancing what linguini is to [blank].…

  • Caption time #11

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  • Things Mother never said

    “You forgot your M-80s and gasoline.” “Be a dear and go play in the streets.” “You need a louder car stereo. I get nervous when you’re a mile away and I can barely hear you.” “I found the cutest snake in the garden today…” “I’m thinking of redecorating the kitchen in a ‘vampires and spiders’…

  • Note to self: 4,699

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