July 2004 | Davezilla

Ten things that disturb me about the Jolly Green Giant

July 31, 2004

He wears a tattered and threadbare tunic with a brand new red scarf. Isn’t aware that green hair is so 1979. Won’t let us see what Mrs. Giant looks like. Responsible for the accidental stepping deaths of 23 American farmers each year. His urine stream causes local flooding. The Giant’s enormous fingers are the reason […]

It’s baddass with the butterfly

July 29, 2004

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Davezilla 18 Comments

Things we’d like to see

July 27, 2004

It is the job of an advertising mascot to amuse us and help us remember a particular product. Unfortunately, most of them serve only to annoy the bejeezus out of us. All week I will be getting out my aggressions on the mascots we’ve come to hate. I detest the Arby’s Oven Mitt and the […]

Davezilla 22 Comments

Overheard: SPF-45 Edition

July 25, 2004

Man No. 1: “Dude! You are so sunburnt. You’re as red as a pineapple!” Man No 2: “Pineapples are yellow?” Man No. 1: Really? I guess I never looked that closely.” viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples […]

Davezilla 7 Comments

Personality Test

July 23, 2004

Frogs are to cannon balls what Valium is to [blank]. Snowflakes are to Australians what abject poverty is to [blank]. Large, fake breasts are to women what tooth decay is to [blank]. George W. Bush is to meatloaf what Cable TV is to [blank]. John Kerry is to salsa dancing what linguini is to [blank]. […]

Davezilla 22 Comments

Things Mother never said

July 21, 2004

“You forgot your M-80s and gasoline.” “Be a dear and go play in the streets.” “You need a louder car stereo. I get nervous when you’re a mile away and I can barely hear you.” “I found the cutest snake in the garden today…” “I’m thinking of redecorating the kitchen in a ‘vampires and spiders’ […]

Davezilla 19 Comments

Betty Crocker: Hot or Not?

July 30, 2004

Davezilla 8 Comments

Enough said

July 28, 2004

Davezilla 23 Comments

Roaming Gnome’s latest adventures

July 26, 2004

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Davezilla 18 Comments

The origin of logotypes

July 24, 2004

Despite their macho image, Dodge Rams are pretty girly. I am reminded of another automotive logo post from three years ago. Image courtesy Tian viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online inurl viagra 6 free samples viagra online viagra for women viagra side […]

Davezilla 12 Comments

Caption time #11

July 22, 2004

Davezilla 27 Comments

Note to self: 4,699

July 20, 2004

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Davezilla 31 Comments