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Ex-Marines who constantly say, "Hey. That's how we did it in the Corps." The guy who feels compelled to one-up every story anyone tells The masses who annually forget how to brake after the first 1/2" of snow falls. Mainly Southerners, who—bless their hearts—can't drive decently any time of the year People who brag at work about how much they give to charity but tell the homeless they can't spare a quarter People who actually believe in dragons Stores that charge more for their gift boxes than for the gifts in them People responsible for recipes like Spam cupcakes Friends…

People who see every natural disaster or world event as somehow intimately tied to themselves, and view their existence as the cause. You’re waiting in a huge line at an over-priced coffee chain. The person in front of you has spent the entire time complaining about how ridiculous the line is and how long everyone is taking to order. It’s finally that person’s turn. Like a deer in the headlights, they suddenly have no idea what they want and need to have each item described in detail. Twice. The guy who always has a story one better than you. No…

Guys who wear t-shirts with tuxedos printed on them. People who finish their sentences by clucking their tongue. Every time. I don't mind the odd lawn gnome or statue of Mary, but when it gets to be a village… People whose entire philosophical base can be summarized through the 18 bumperstickers littering their Chevy Astro. Coworkers who feel every situation warrants a line from Homer Simpson. People who take "pitchers" with their "point 'n' snaps". Anyone who whips out their gold card at the dollar store Men who claim to have confronted and fought off Bigfoot. Drivers who take pains…