Category: Observations

  • The Hate Cake

    My mother made me a Hate Cake today. I don’t know what I did to upset her so, but it must have been bad. This was the meanest Hate Cake I’d ever seen. And I’ve seen plenty in my time. In place of flour, she’d substituted plaster dust. The cake had three wicked layers—each more…

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    Davezilla

  • Dress Codes Are Different Across North America

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    Davezilla

  • Pugs are made from gel

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    Davezilla

  • DIY Hints You Should Probably Ignore

    Need to liven up the office Xmas party? Photoshop your coworkers’ heads into pictures from questionable websites and you’ve got a slideshow everyone will be talking about! Use Strontium-90 to soothe a colicky baby. Old Ethernet cables make great leashes for the elderly! Use “Swiffer” sheets to quickly erase your sibling’s homework. Worried about what…

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    Davezilla

  • Grammar: You’re doing it wrong

    Really not sure what disturbs me more: The phrase, the lack of apostrophes or the letter spacing.

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    Davezilla

  • Not sure about Ralph Lauren’s New Naming

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    Davezilla

  • What’s Your Deepest Fear?

    Out with it. What’s your deepest, darkest fear? Turns out, I have quite a few. Here’s my top ten: Given a life sentence in a prison populated by mimes and clowns. Rosie O’Donnell runs for president in 2016. She takes Sarah Palin as VP in a surprise move. They call it the She Party, win…

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    Davezilla

  • What I Learned About Italians from 10 Days in Naples

    Their local motto is, “If you can drive in Napoli, you can drive in Hell.” At the outdoor cafés, pigeons are smarter than waiters. The pizza really is 10 times better. Pulcinella is either good luck, bad luck, an evil clown or a sex god, depending on whom you ask. Napoli is full of budding…

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    Davezilla

  • Uhhh…

    USAWALTZ from Asami Ike on Vimeo.

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    Davezilla

  • It’s Friday

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    Davezilla

  • Slowest drivers on the road

    IMO, slowest drivers on the road own: PT Cruiser Chrysler Pacifica Ford Flex Discuss.

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    Davezilla

  • My Embarassing Dream Soundtracks

    As I’ve written about before, I remember most of my dreams, which isn’t so bad, but they always have a soundtrack. A bad one. Usually a short section of a song or jingle that repeats throughout the dream like a broken record. Ninety percent of the time, it’s a musical genre I would not listen…

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    Davezilla