What I Learned from Movies XIV: Military Movies
Holding up a fist will instantly stop an entire army dead in their tracks. Any time bullets are shot at you in slow motion, you can avoid them (in slow motion) by leaning way back until your spine is almost broken. Hover in this position for several seconds until the bullet-time effect has ended. Make a 'V' with your index and middle finger. Now point them at your eyes, then your fellow soldiers' eyes. This alerts them to use vision instead of their sense of smell to navigate streets and tunnels. The enemy can't smell lit cigars due to their…
What Men Say vs. What Women Hear
When we describe ourselves as being, “Super athletic.” You hear, “Flexes in front of the mirror. Every. Damn. Day.” When we describe ourselves as, “A big guy.” You hear, “A big, fat guy.” When we describe ourselves as being, “Quick-witted.” You hear, “Lies quickly.” When we describe ourselves as, “A traveler.” You hear, “Cheats on the road.” When we describe ourselves as, “A seasoned traveler.” You hear, “Strippers across the country know him by name.” When we describe ourselves as being, “In a band.” You hear, “Cheats on the road, while high.” When we describe ourselves as, “A burger and…
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