Year: 2005

Natalie: i went crazy at Whole Foods today Natalie: i didn’t eat lunch til about 3 Me: you went crazy? Me: Did you smash things and scream in your underwear in the frozen food aisle? Natalie: i brought back about 4 different salads and a veggie samosa Natalie: in my underwear viagra free viagra buy…

At least, I think it was naked Twister. Heard this through the apartment wall, despite popped ears and stuffed sinuses (I have loud neighbors). Male voice: Right foot … Blue! Female voice: Your ass is fucking hairy, dude! Female voice: [loud squeal] Female voice: Dammit! [squeal] Male voice: Left hand … [mumble] Female voice: You…

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Freak No. 1: I heared about the China folks making all the t-shirts in China for the US of A. Freak No. 2: What? Freak No. 1: I said I was listening to NPR. They had this thing about China. They make all the t-shirts for th’ US of A now. All of em. Freak…

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Try to remember that “a little bit” and “extra” are relative terms and some people have different ideas about what they entail. At Subway, “a little bit” of mayonnaise apparently means “1.2 quarts” and “extra” jalapeños means “enough capsacin to choke a Mexican short order cook”. viagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how…