Unlikely candle scents

I bought a candle. The label said, “Fig-Olive”, which sounds like rather a revolting combination, but actually smells quite good. These, however, may not.

  1. “The Toronto” A tantalizing combination of raccoon musk and overturned garbage can
  2. Last Year’s Yogurt
  3. “CSI” Experience forensic science in 8 and 10 inch tapers
  4. Burnt broccoli-melting styrofoam
  5. Unwashed Mawashi
  6. $2 Whore
  7. Wet Dog fur. Nuff said
  8. “The Bender” Tom Waits’ breath after a two week drinking binge
  9. Campground outhouse
  10. State Fair Petting Zoo

Comments

34 responses to “Unlikely candle scents”

  1. rust Avatar

    “Moosepants” — Musk and Butt meet to give a provocative odour only a Canadian could appreciate.

  2. JFLY Avatar
    JFLY

    #1 Primate House
    #2 After the Game
    #3 Sauteed Garlic
    #4 Fisherman’s Wharf
    #5 Basement Musk
    #6 Grandma
    #7 Boiled Kidneys
    #8 Kitty Litter
    #9 Chicago Stockyards
    #10 Leftover Sauerkraut

  3. CJ Avatar

    How about, “One Week Full Diaper Pail” for a lovely candle fragrance? As for the link, what kind of lame-ass kid is this that he even thought to do this?, and how the hell did he manage to find a prom date to go with him looking like he came out of the recycling bin? And the hair? FRO-NO-NO! BTW, Dave- I’ve been reading for about a week now, and have never laughed so hard at a site!

  4. Spud Avatar
    Spud

    odour de toilete
    scent duois puke

    :boobs:

  5. Bob Boyn Avatar
    Bob Boyn

    Diaper filled with Indian food

  6. Bob Boyn Avatar
    Bob Boyn

    The guy with the coke cans is Screech,right?

  7. Davezilla Avatar

    I rather thought him the love child of Yahoo Serious and Napoleon Dynamite. 😈

  8. Nikki Avatar

    Duct tape would have been more comfortable.

  9. Merth Avatar

    As big of a hit as Napoleon Dynamite was… this kid might have been prom queen… err king.

    Failed candle scents:
    1. Dirty Sanchez
    2. Chili Dog
    3. wet dog
    4. corporate office ambience
    5. cloride & amonia

  10. Mikel Avatar
    Mikel

    The new Burbon Street during Mardi Gras scent!!

  11. mikeB Avatar
    mikeB

    I just looked up #5 mawashi. Dude. No. No. No. :dead:

  12. jindun Avatar
    jindun

    Is that guys date Kelly Osbourne? Oh, what about Weed & Coors D-light

  13. michel v Avatar

    And then there’s Slipknot incense. I wonder if it smells like the band backstage after a concert.

  14.  Avatar
    Anonymous

    How about “ass n’ Sack” That lovely odor eminating from the location in question that men generate after a hot sweaty day in breifs!

  15.  Avatar
    Anonymous

    “Baby Burp”

    If you have kids – you know what I’m talking about

  16. rust Avatar

    also failed:
    “GREAT WHITE” — a mixture of styrofoam and burnt hair.

  17.  Avatar
    Anonymous

    “Levorotary Sweetness”

    That lovely smell that barroom urinals give off a 2:00 in the morning

  18.  Avatar
    Anonymous

    “Decomposing Passion”

    That ever so pleasant scent that dead animals in your attic give off after dying there 3 weeks ago in the middle of the summer…

  19. Bob Boyn Avatar
    Bob Boyn

    Spellcheck people! What the hell is a leveratory!

  20.  Avatar
    Anonymous

    “Neighboring flatulence”

    That wondrous oder that one cubical in every office building has – where the “old guy” sits.

  21. MIKE Avatar
    MIKE

    The first fart in the morning after a night of beer on tap and pickeled eggs

  22. rust Avatar

    “Kippers ‘n’ Kabbage” — a lustful fragrance based on English salted fish and German sauerkraut. YUMMY!

  23. Themrdoug Avatar
    Themrdoug

    Eteu De….
    China:-(
    Fried Dog Poop ❗
    Hockey bag 😡
    Burnt Hair :dead:

    Coke can tux? Lame. What happened to the old days when you would go to prom for 15 min and spend the next 15 hours drinking to a near death experience?

  24. Mumbles Avatar
    Mumbles

    “Ann Coulter”

  25. Dante Avatar

    Cum-scented candles?

  26. Keith Burgin Avatar

    The new scent from Tommy Holefinger… “Urp”

    The scent of a dead man’s rotting nutsack combined with just a hint of jasmine.

  27. pappy Avatar
    pappy

    I’ve got one.

    Ode de band members who don’t wear deodorant after a full day of band camp..

    Sorry, personal experience. I had camp this week. Bleh. :dead:

  28. tinamarie Avatar
    tinamarie

    Okay, so he’s got a coke can tuxedo, but what is this?

    http://www.burntvelvet.net/gondaba/P1010204.JPG

    Looks like a coke can cock!

  29. Steppenwolf Avatar
    Steppenwolf

    Dingleberry Delight

  30. C-rolla Avatar
    C-rolla

    Candle Scents:
    1. Trailer
    2. Fromunda
    3. Tijuana Nights

  31. troidious Avatar
    troidious

    :-?…..FOOT DE FUNGUS #5
    Acid Reflux & egg
    More than a memory-
    (onion & cilantro in goat cheese)

  32. banda Avatar
    banda

    1. Upper Decker
    2. Bong Water
    3. Fraternity Carpet
    4. Bourbon Street
    5. Holding Cell
    6. H1B Contract Programmer
    7. Septic Tank
    8. Forgotten Tupperware
    9. Jock Itch
    10. City Garbage Strike

  33. ramjet Avatar
    ramjet

    i say felching farm fields– meaning a piss infected cum bubble dripping from an anthrax infected sheeps asshole! sick sick sick

  34. Natalie Avatar

    Cat Breath Scent would be pretty bad.