Ever see women with ridiculously long nails? Grown to a length where they begin to curl into talons and turn yellowish? There are some men that grow them long too, but the majority are women. I’ve always wondered how these people get through their every day lives. Think about the things that would be difficult and painful, if not impossible to do with nails like that.
- Getting in and out of a taxi
- Sending a text message
- Zipping up a zipper
- Un/Lacing a corset
- Un/Hooking a bra
- Juggling axes
- Braiding hair
- Push-ups
- Jenga!
- Playing hockey
- Reading Braille
- Using a jackhammer
- Putting in contact lenses
- Playing Cat’s Cradle
- Counting stolen loot
- Using chopsticks
- Performing a Bris
- Self-gratification
- Soldering electrical equipment
- Wiping a baby’s bum and changing the diaper
Comments
20 responses to “The Problem with Long Nails”
A sleeping suggestion for these people:
http://www.istockphoto.com/file_thumbview_approve/9108944/2/istockphoto_9108944-serious-man-wearing-dog-cone.jpg
21. Network Gaming
22. Diddling
23. Giving a hand job
24. Wiping their own ass
25. Finger foods
26. Giving the finger
27. Digging for gold, aka cleaning out the nostrils
28. Giving a high five or a fist bump
29. Fisting
30. changing a tampon
Must save a fortune on garden rakes all the same….
holding a hamburfger
drinking from a paper cup
cleaning
tieing your shoes
scratching you head and giving yourself lacerations]
scratching her lovers back…to the bone
If we were meant to have claws, I’d want mine to be retractable like a cats.
Petting a cat or dog.
Pushing an elevator button.
Giving a massage (that means no happy ending).
And Avalon, if you’re gonna have retractable claws, why not make them adamantium claws like Wolverine?
Talking to deaf people in sign language.. The deaf people responding, “I don’t understand you, those nails give you a weird accent.”
Is it just me, or is it always grocery store cashiers who have these nails?
Giving a dog or cat a good scratch would be no problem but depending on the gender, scratching ones own nuts or someone elses would most likely prove to be problematic or downright disasterous. :wtf:
Whenever I see nails like that, my initial thoughts are of how much poop has accumulated in them big ol’ scoops. Must be like trying to dredge a canal with Jai-Alai equipment.
Believe it or not. I worked with a lady with long nails like that at the Dodge truck plant in Warren Mi. She fit truck doors on the assymbly line ten hr. a day. Not only were they long, they had little gold chains from the nails to the rings she wore on all fingers.
Pardon me if this is a repeat, but, um, handjob.
She’s got to own a bidet because there’s no way in hell that ass gets proper attention otherwise. I would imagine that doing anything is a major pain, except caring for those lobster claws and even that probably requires the assistance of others.
I think Timm gets the award for best answer-“weird accent”, what a hoot!
putting in/taking out contacts??
Well, there is ONE obvious benefit. Kinky sex. Need I say more? :wang:
how about using a regular lighter unless its the type that slides?
It used to be that it was a sign of affluence. Meaning they paid other people to do everything on the list. Extra for some of these ideas.
pushing buttons on a microwave
dialing a phone
pooper scooper duty
washing dishes
tickle fights
bathing your dog
washing your face
PUTTING ON EARRINGS (why did nobody think of that earlier)
brushing your hair
feeding a hamster