Funny Bunches of Goats

Rejected Names for Cereals

06 November, 2013Posted inBad Ideas3 Comments
So this post originally appeared here in 2008, but as I have been going back through older posts, I keep finding horrible spam injections—some of which cannot be removed with out deleting the entire post. This is a shame because some of these posts had dozens of comments. This one had 72 comments, so I am reposting it. Anytime you see a new post that has the tag "repost", you'll know the original was deleted due to spam. Lice Krispies Kellogg's Porn Flakes Frosted Mini Feets Sugar Frosted Aches Ape Nuts Cap'n Chronic Brute Loops Unlucky Harms Funny Bunches of…

Song of Solomon, Deconstructed

28 June, 2009Posted inObservations27 Comments
If you've ever read the Song of Solomon in the bible—a love poem between two lovers—then you've read one of the weirdest books ever. The way the woman is described makes her sound like something only H.P. Lovecraft could conceive of. In fact, this guy may have been writing about Cthulhu. If I told my fiancée that her breasts looked like two deer and her teeth like sheep, I think I'd be sleeping on the couch for a month. Let's look at a few choice verses: Her: # Behold, thou art fair, my love; behold, thou art fair; thou hast…

New takes on old phrases

17 June, 2009Posted inObservations28 Comments
Try using some of these in a business meeting, or with a customer this week. Shit or get off the Pope It's not pocket science It is what it was A jack of all maids Like white on color Familiarity breeds mice Don't rock the goat The show must grow lawns Caught with his pants brown Sharp as a stack