New takes on old phrases

Try using some of these in a business meeting, or with a customer this week.

  1. Shit or get off the Pope
  2. It’s not pocket science
  3. It is what it was
  4. A jack of all maids
  5. Like white on color
  6. Familiarity breeds mice
  7. Don’t rock the goat
  8. The show must grow lawns
  9. Caught with his pants brown
  10. Sharp as a stack
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comment 28 comments
  • Sammy

    Yeah! Sure, Thanks!!

  • chainstay

    Have a nice flay.
    Don’t look a ghost horse in the south.
    Home is where your house is.
    ’tis better to live than recede.
    Been bare, loved that.
    A turd in the hand is worse than poo on your tush.

  • Lung the Younger

    You can’t make an omelette without laying eggs.

    The button line.

    Thinking outside the pox.

    We’re all on the same pager here.

    A level playing fiend.

    At the end of the daze.

    Core combatency.

    Steamlining

  • hoatzin

    Out of the frying pan and into the friar

    It’s an ill wind that blows your body odor in my direction

    I depend on the kindness of stranglers…

    I hate to Monday morning tight end, but…

    That really threw a wench in the works

    I’m Irish, born in bread

  • StevieC

    Don’t lick a gift whore in the mouse

    A favourite of mine (and I use it to see if anyone is paying attention) – half of one, six dozen of the other.

  • fruf

    kill two stones with one bird

  • junkman

    -a watched boil never pops
    -it was a bitter pole to swallow
    -he had an ass up his sleeve
    -she was born with a saliva spoon in her mouth
    -burning the midnight url
    -the pen is writier than the sword
    -loose lips drink sips
    -he was lying by the seat of his pants
    -straight from the whores mouth
    -we are scraping the bottom of will farrell

  • Bigwavdave

    Familiarity breeds mice

    I always thought it was Familiarity Breeds πŸ˜‰

  • chainstay

    If you can’t somthing nice about someone, shut the fuck up.

  • chainstay

    One bad apple doesn’t spoli the whole benchmark.

  • fruf

    if you can’t stand the heat….go fry your arse

  • Mandy's Kidding

    Though it’s not a cliche, it was one of my favorite lines to ever come out of someone’s mouth during a company-wide meeting:

    “I don’t know how to get my hands around this because there’s so much of it!”

  • Davezilla

    [quote comment=”633356″]Though it’s not a cliche, it was one of my favorite lines to ever come out of someone’s mouth during a company-wide meeting:
    “I don’t know how to get my hands around this because there’s so much of it!”[/quote]

    Mandy, please don’t leak your private IMs into meetings anymore. πŸ˜›

  • Meagan

    Bread men sell no stales.

    The girly nerd gets the bookworm.

  • chainstay

    Judge not unless ye be Judge Dredd.

  • StevieC

    Fool me once, shame on … … … shame on you. Fool me β€” I can’t get fooled again.

  • junkman

    [quote comment=”633369″]Fool me once, shame on … … … shame on you. Fool me β€” I can’t get fooled again.[/quote]
    two bushes aren’t worth a bird in the hand!

  • YankeeRose32

    Just try to pull this one off smoothly and with a straight face sometime:

    I hope when you go home tonight your momma runs out from under the porch and bites you!

    and of course: I have places to see and people to do.

  • J

    Don’t pet the sweaty things

  • junkman

    [quote comment=”633383″]Don’t pet the sweaty things[/quote]
    nice!

  • StevieC

    I actually heard this one being used in a meeting today:

    “Get two birds stoned at once”

    I asked the guy afterwards if he was a Davezilla fan and all I got back was a blank stare.

  • Doug B

    Doe’s the pope shit in the woods?

  • Doug B

    Sorry. Does the pope shit in the woods?

  • Spud

    “I believe in milko’s, you sexy thang…”

  • chainstay

    Waste a lot, get subsidized a lot.

  • Craigaroonie

    never mind the quality, feel the child labour
    don’t talk with your mouth fool
    leave no tone unsterned
    every cloud has a silver nitrate component
    find a penny, pick it up and all that day you’ll have one percent of a buck
    the dog is mandy’s best friend
    – i made that last one up

  • rem1967

    It is better to have stalked a blonde than never to have stalked at all.

  • Timm

    Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can pass off onto someone else.

    or

    Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can get someone else to do.

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