How to win an argument with a dog

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How to win an argument with a cat

Begin with a standard ontological argument, such as Gödel’s Theorum. Open with Definition 1: x is God-like iff x has as essential properties those and only those properties which are positive Your cat will likely counter that no definition of the notion of “positive property” is supplied with the proof. At most, the various axioms which involve this concept can be taken to provide a partial implicit definition. Ignore this interruption and continue with Definitions 2 and 3. Your cat will yawn to discourage you and remind you that if a property belongs to the set, then its negation does…

print:”Hello Kitty”;

If HTML had been developed by the Japanese first, we would have tags like: <BigHappyFun>Welcome to my Life!</BigHappyFun> girl {skirt-length:shorter; panty-color:#fff; bend:always;} $checkGrammar = explode('?', $checkGrammar); function sailor_from_Moon($schoolGirl) { if ($schoolGirl == 'underage') return naked; } <pikachu>I choose you</pikachu> <style="eyes: 475%; mouth: 45%; leg-length: 300%; skirt: 5%;"> function get_girlstohavesex_withXrating ( $cat_hentai = "noclothes", $before = '', $after = '<tentacles>', $between = "legs", $show_images = true, $orderby =( offensiveness ) $flavors = $this -> iceCream( squid_ink ); With assistance from the lovely Natalieviagra free viagra buy viagra online generic viagra how does viagra work cheap viagra buy viagra buy viagra online…

Google doesn’t have everything

Your search - "George W. Bush is a fricking genius" - did not match any documents. Your search - "I broke my monkey" - did not match any documents. Your search - "Bush ate my waffles" - did not match any documents. Your search - "Ally McBeal's brain" - did not match any documents. Your search - "Davezilla hates popcorn" - did not match any documents. Your search - "Spamming is good clean fun" - did not match any documents. Your search - "Do mermaids get breast implants?" - did not match any documents. Your search - "The BackStreet Boys…

All right, who befoozled the Intraweb again?

Tech Support Person in Bangladesh: "Good evening and hello today. I am please to help you very much." Clueless computer user in Duluth: "It's morning, sonny. Do you know stuff about computers and all cause I don't know a thing." Tech Support: "Yes, sir. I am having the Microsoft Certification last year." Clueless in Duluth: ] "It's ma'am, not sir. Microsoft huh? What if I have an Apple?" Tech Support: "I am sorry sir, but this is a technical help phone is. We are having Microsoft problem helpings daily every day. We do not service the Apple computers is. I…

Is your date up to standard?

The World Wide Web Consortium (W3C) has released its newest validator: Valid Date v1.0. No more will you have to worry if your date is a psycho or a mournful, misshapen freak. When your date is sporting the W3C Valid Date Button, you can rest assured they've passed the quality assurance testing and rigorous standards that make for a delightful evening.