Recent Effluvia:

1. Spruce needles
2. Bacon
3. Ramen
4. Live guppies
5. Dijonnaise
6. Bullion cubes
7. Gouda
8. Spam
9. Poutine
10. Scrambled Egg
11. Pepperoni
12. Mice
13. Balut
14. Chitterlings
15. Krab
16. Meringue
17. Foil
18. a Guinea Pig
19. Pie
20. And your suggestion?

Minnie sent me an excellent book entitled “Here Speeching American”, something my readers excel at. I love the Engrish shopping sections, one in particular from—where else—Japan.

Door No. 1 Entrance
Door No. 2 Exitrance

Aisle A: Caned Fruit
Aisle B: Caned Vegitarian
Caned Fish Meat
Caned Meat Floss

“A lovely paper for your toilet life”
[Toilet paper wrapping]

“Be half as fresh as the day is long
[Tampon slogan]

Rechee Milk Flavor Chips: Use for snack, fun, panties

What’s the strangest label you’ve ever seen?

1. Place cat on sunny spot near a window
2. Focus camera
3. Move cat back onto sunny spot near window
4. Focus camera
5. Look for cat under sofa
6. Call for cat
7. Get out can opener
8. Put cat back on sunny spot
9. Focus camera
10. Marvel at beauty of cat
11. Praise cat for sitting so still
12. Take photo
13. Look at preview window
14. Notice cat is conspicuously absent from photo
15. Look for cat
16. Put double-sided tape on sunny spot by window
17. Drop cat on tape
18. Focus camera
19. Take photo
20. Marvel at photo of cat clawing your camera in two