2005 New Year’s Resolutions

  1. I promise not to roll my cats in powdered cheese.
  2. I will not randomly dial extensions at work and tell coworkers they’ve been let go.
  3. I resolve not to post any pictures of myself in a thong.
  4. I promise not to mistake cat laxatives for toothpaste at my GF’s house.
  5. I will not invite Shannen Doherty and Danny Bonaduce over for weekenders anymore.
  6. I resolve to cover your voles in glitter!
  7. I promise to finish building my Tiki palace (You think I’m kidding).
  8. I promise not to mistake Starr Jones for a passing Goodyear Blimp.
  9. I promise to visit at least one tacky tourist attraction a month next year. And post pictures.
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27 Replies to “2005 New Year’s Resolutions”

  1. If you’re going to visit tacky tourist attractions this year, you have to go see the Corn Palace in Mitchell, South Dakota. ๐Ÿ˜€

  2. Happy New Year!

    Go Dave! get down on bended knee and spoil the hell out of Natalie.

    hmmmmm almost haiku like.

    One tacky tourist spot huh? well how about the Big Banana at Coffs Harbour? about two hours north of Sydney? can’t get much tackier than that.

    trust me

    ๐Ÿ˜€

  3. Dave,

    Marry Nat in the Corn palace and post pictures.
    If she is silly enough to take you up on it, then congrats and much happiness.

    Oh, and you still have the rest of the day to post the thong picture, you better get to it quickly.

    ~Aaron

  4. Congratulations Bro!!! You can take care of two resolutions at once; there is a great honeymoon spot for you near the Mackinac Bridge, its the home of a “Man-Eating Giant Clam” right here in Michigan! Pick me up some sea shells while you two crazy kids are there, okay?:grin:

  5. Well, if you’re honeymooning near Mackinac Island, you should go to the Mystery Spot (where they claim that the laws of physics go awry). http://mysteryspot.com/

    Basically, everything’s built on a slant and they try to convince you that things roll uphill and crap like that. They actually tricked some of the more gullible tourists who were there at the same time we were; it was actually worth the admission price just to see that.

  6. Any chance we can get a picture of that hot Canadian woman in a thong? ๐Ÿ˜ˆ

    And congrats on that “not rolling the cat in cheese” thing.

  7. Congrats on the marriage schtuff! W00t! ๐Ÿ˜†

    You can always come down to Arizona, and take a picture of y’all in thongs by ‘THE THING’ (cue ominous music) I think it’s located somewhere by Phoenix, although I couldn’t tell you for sure what it was. I think some giant ball of string, or something like that. ๐Ÿ˜€

  8. I resolve to eat a few less french fries next year. Other than that, I can’t promise anything.

    Have a great and safe New Year’s, everybody!:grin:

  9. Woo hoo for marriage, congratulations! Canadian women are the rockinest’

    Maybe you can’t email anonymous a happy couple pic, but you could post one here.

    Do it, do it now.

  10. Pingback: Timbu :: Musings
  11. What wonderful news. The Tiki Palace sounds amazingly cheesy and I’m sure my darling spouse would love to help you in anyway he can. It’s an obsession of his.

    Also the pending nuptials make me feel very happy for you two….people…I don’t really know.

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