How to drive in winter

1. family jules

   07 February, 2006, 3:34 am

   13. As roads get slicker, drive faster so if you even get close to your destination, you can sliiiiiiide the rest of the way.
   14. Pay no attention to the increasing number of cars pulled over to the side of the road, they are no indication of road conditions, just of the talent of the drivers. YOU can still make it, you are just that damn good!
   15. When going up a hill on ice, if you are still moving forward at all, keep gunning it. You will run out of hill before you run out of gas.

2. Ace

   07 February, 2006, 4:28 am

   Screw the car! Take shoes off and skate to your destination on your socks!

3. Spud

   07 February, 2006, 5:47 am

   As Charles Dickens once said “He would make a lovely corpse. ”

   😛

4. mitch

   07 February, 2006, 6:16 am

   16. Move to warmer climes and forget all of that nonsense. Leave it for the Eskimos and Lutherans.

5. Aunt Stacy

   07 February, 2006, 6:43 am

6. Nikki

   07 February, 2006, 6:58 am

   Hummer drivers need to all simultaneously implode and this should be a televised event. :java:

7. Alex

   07 February, 2006, 7:18 am

   Don’t forget mega caffeine and if you bring an attractive lady with you– make certain she is on PMS!

   Then give her the wheel and the caffeine!

8. JFLY

   07 February, 2006, 7:35 am

   Things to do once you’ve run off the road and are trapped in a snowbank:

   1. See if your tongue will stick to the window
   2. Pass gas, knowing the other passengers are trapped inside with you
   3. Finally empty the ashtray and set your radio’s preset buttons
   4. Attempt to signal for help in morse code with your headlights
   5. Wait and see who has the urge to pee first
   6. Scare the other passengers by speaking supportively of “The Donner Party”
   7. Moon the passing traffic
   8. Play with all the switches and knobs on the dash pretending it will help the situation
   9. Attempt to play “Stairway to Heaven” on the horn
   10. Claim you hurt yourself in the collision so that someone else has to walk for help

9. Russell

   07 February, 2006, 7:36 am

   [Comment ID #21771 will be quoted here]
   hey hey hey hummer drivers provide a great public service they clear the street of those anoying sub compact cars
   😈

10. Fran

    07 February, 2006, 7:50 am

    I’m not sure which is more disturbing: the picture of Dave or the dance blog site. Maybe Tami can animate the picture of Zilla and then I won’t have to decide. 😀

11. jayray

    07 February, 2006, 9:04 am

    :troll:

12. frisko

    07 February, 2006, 9:13 am

    Natalie cut her hair.
    As for snow…stay home, or get a hotel with the babe in the passenger seat.

13. Craig

    07 February, 2006, 9:47 am

    Make sure you have plenty of other people in the car who think they can do a waaaaaay better job of driving than you. 👿

14. Nina

    07 February, 2006, 12:06 pm

    Awwww….Did you have a bad driving experiance? 😀

15. underdog

    07 February, 2006, 12:26 pm

    😛

16. Bubbles

    07 February, 2006, 12:46 pm

    [Comment ID #21767 will be quoted here]

    Move to San Diego and leave the nasty weather for the Mormons.

17. Other April

    07 February, 2006, 12:48 pm

    13. Exchange lifesavers nipples for hershey’s miniature nipples.

18. frisko

    07 February, 2006, 1:34 pm

    Bravo to Other April.

19. MrDoug

    07 February, 2006, 2:57 pm

    Turn off lights
    Drop right foot to accelerator
    Spin steering wheel to left
    Driving backwards? Check
    Turn lights back on
    Scare the wholly living crap out of on coming traffic
    Keep spinning rear wheel drive chevy into ditch
    Lick nipple savers until help arrives

20. frisko

    07 February, 2006, 3:56 pm

    I am going to piddle myself over the “nipple savers”. Good thing that they are safety sealed for our protection-tee hee.

21. Esther

    07 February, 2006, 4:00 pm

    Nipple savers – the perfect Valentine’s gift.

22. Lace Valentine

    07 February, 2006, 6:51 pm

    Hard liquor is good winter food.

    Beer is good summer food.

    Alas, anyone driving in Michigan during the winter is more than likely worthy of a DUI.

    :troll: 😈

23. Davezilla

    07 February, 2006, 7:02 pm

    [Comment ID #21867 will be quoted here]

    ‘Twas not Michigan, but the Canadian 401 Hwy, which was one continuous blizzard for 200 miles. 😕

24. Master Solace

    08 February, 2006, 12:41 am

    [Comment ID #21867 will be quoted here]

    I live in Indiana, I can guarantee that my state is more prone to the whole DUI in winter…hell, I think that the DUI is more like DWI and that the time of year is more like all year long. :troll:

25. Tami Jo

    08 February, 2006, 6:43 am

    I don’t call hiim Zillicious for nothing. I just report the news, I don’t make it up.

26. kennyh2o

    09 February, 2006, 12:17 pm

    #1 Bring plenty of snacks and drinks (beer nuts and bottle opener) cool cd’s and hershey’s nipples aren’t bad either. forget the snow-chains their a pain to put on,and noisy.It’s one of the best down-times you could hope for in Mich.

27. nick

    09 February, 2006, 6:45 pm

    16. don’t stop at all costs even if the cops come 😛

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