Dwarf and the Seven Snow Whites

Once upon a time, Davezilla went to the Auto Show. There he met Seven Snow Whites living in the Cadillac exhibit. They were sweet and let him take their picture. They let a lot of men take their picture, in fact. Their names were DopedUp, Grungy, Suc, Clappy, Flashful, Sleazy and Creepy (the one on the far right).

Seven Snow Whites

The Seven Snow Whites were having a lovely time posing for cameras and showing a bit too much skin, when who should stroll along, but a magical Dwarf who looked remarkably like the offspring of Ron Jeremy and a fig. The Dwarf wanted to marry all Seven Snow Whites and keep them in his cave. The Snow Whites wanted none of that shit and told him politely to keep his phone number to himself.

The Dwarf

But this was a persistent and rather troublesome Dwarf. He asked them again, not only to come home with him to his magical cave, but to do all sorts of unspeakable things with him. Fortunately, the Security Guards in shining armor came to the rescue and escorted him back to his cave.

The End

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  1. Spud

    Oh yeah, I want me some of that booty…

    On another level that picture of the girls, reminds me of a Robert Plant song from a few years ago, can’t remember the name of it though.


  2. Yeah, the dwarf really ought to be careful. If he shmoozes up too close to those lofty models he might end up getting a box in the face. Cha-chang!

    Jesus look at the legs on Nº. 5! Miss Eating Disorder 2006.

  3. Wendy

    OK, I used to model, but I never looked that scary!

    Spud, the song was called ‘Stand back” from Peter Gabriel…. the one where they were all dressed alike and hair done the same and the red lips… πŸ™‚

  4. Spud

    Wendy, are you sure about that?

    I laughed my arse off about the box in the face monsuier lung, that’s exactly what he’d get.

    Come to think of it, that wouldn’t be so bad would it…


  5. jwalkingthunder

    can we make it 2 dewarfs and 7 snow whites hey theres plenty come on ill take the scary 1 it’s
    not the face i want lol :undies: :boob: :thong: :wang:

  6. Steppenwolf

    Robert Palmer – Simply Irresistable…except those women were attractive. :wang:

  7. Anna

    Wasn’t that Robert Palmer – “addicted to love”?

  8. Anna

    Now about those girls … or should you call them boney chicks. And wasn’t there a song called “Short people”?

  9. Shannon

    They remind me of the ho train they used to have on that wrestling show. :undies: :undies: :kiss: :kiss:

  10. eyesaboveu

    instead of taking pics maybe he should have shownhis :wang: then and only then the whites might have visited his house of love πŸ’‘

  11. Spud

    Yes, Robert Palmer – Addicted To Love – Thanks Anna :kiss:

    From the link of the day –
    So happy fucking New Year, America. While weÒ€ℒre definitely way up shit creek without a goddamn canoe, there is one ray of hope: November 2006 is duck hunting season in Congressional districts across this great land. Lock and load, motherfuckers.

    Is there an Amen out there?


  12. mitch

    The ways of love are many and diverse. Let us not judge this poor, pathetic piece of putrid puss….he’s only doing what’s natural within the parameters of his seriously defective mind-set. πŸ˜†

  13. Craig

    “Anybody want a cheeseburger?” πŸ‘Ώ

  14. starhealer

    hey i think i might have a cure for #5 POT give you the munches. the dwarf i got a cure for him also but he might cach sometime as my stepmother is quite nasty :limp:

  15. elimae

    That rant made me feel all warm and fuzzy. amen my brotha!

  16. I’m surprised # 7 didn’t bust out with the zombie action, and eat everyone’s brains. :wtf:

  17. What Esther said… ye gads, I don’t know which one is scarier: the dwarf or #7. ❓

  18. logan

    what the heck is up with the models faces they look deformed


  19. nicnic

    Damn #5 what happened to you or what didn’t happen to you. Girl you need to eat, and #7 you need to be ashamed of yourself, I heard of some women thinking that a little (little) rib bone showing was sexy but chest bone, clavicle bone. Come on chick you look like you just got off the streets, and been hungry for years. And that get up. I hope you didn’t pick that out. And don’t be scared of the little knome, he’s only trying to feed you.

  20. Bubbles

    Someone please take these ladies to a Pizza Hut or something. As for the Randy Newman ‘Short People’ song, I quote: “Don’t want no short people ’round here.” πŸ™

  21. Auto Show, or Homeliest Models contest; you decide.

    Shiny Bulemics of America, unite!

  22. MrDoug

    So what did he do? Walk up to one of the skank of the days and say “Gee your hair smells terrific” πŸ˜›

  23. JFLY

    Dave, are you sure this isn’t that missing “Redneck Beauty Contest” photo I tried to e-mail you? πŸ˜›

  24. Skipperobi

    [Comment ID #17540 Will Be Quoted Here]

    a fucking huge AMEN πŸ‘Ώ

  25. chainstay

    It looks to me, That being a car show and all, that they were modeling

  26. MandyLocke

    So your Ron Jeremy disguise failed, huh Dave? :kiss:

  27. tinamarie

    #3 looks like a man!

    And that fucker and his rant are seriously righteous! Amen.

  28. Daniel

    Hey Dave, I agree with the Ron Jeremy knock off, but I got one better. I think he looks a little more like Dennis Franz, just with a Ron Jeremy wig. Or maybe is WAS Dennis Franz, just stoned. I don’t know, you tell me. And the women look like the lineup for the auditions to play the T-X in Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines, and number #7 looks her brought her metallic make-up, she REALLY wanted the part.
    Please, tell me what you guys think.

  29. Spud

    Actually this could be the Knicks line up for season 2006.


  30. JFLY

    Everyone is overlooking the fact that this was a Cadillac exhibit…obviously they are cheap hookers.

    And Dave…you should’ve been out shopping in Kenosha WI tonight. It was a Freak-Watcher’s paradise. I’m guessing today was the day all the people who collect Freak Compensation got their checks. I have never seen so many strange people in one evening. Next month, I’m gonna bring my camera.

  31. jabe

    [Comment ID #17514 Will Be Quoted Here]

    The Robert Plant song would be Addicted to Love. And those ladies look like health department patients. Who would touch with a ten foot pole? Not me. ❓

  32. mistygal

    They are waiting in line to sign up for ron jeremys new porn flick~~ SKANKVILLE ~~ :puke:

  33. Kaylee Smitherson

    whew hot!!! :boob: :boob: :thong: :wang: :kiss: 😈

  34. Kris

    can i get some or no?
    is he really that small i thought that it was special effects. i wish i was him :java: πŸ˜›

  35. grrldog

    I SAW THAT TOO!!!!!! -and then I ran away, as fast as I could!!!

Comments are closed