- Women in front of me at the airport Xray who wear knee-high lace-up boots
- People who try to parallel park while on the cell phone
- The coworker who ate the last bagel before I got one
- People who suck at life
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White guys who try to act like Vanilla Ice when they really sound like a slushie. 🙄 ❓
1. Men who flaunt their testosterone and think they are God’s gift to womankind.
2. Bikers who rev up their engines as loudly as possible while speeding down a nice, quiet street.
3. Women with fake boobs.
4. Name-droppers.
5. People who marinate themselves in perfume. This is especially torturous if you are sharing elevator space with them.
😈
People who complain about people they hate. Just kidding, I do it all the time, preferably to the person I’m complaining about.
Klesko? Sometimes it’s fun to be a tad misanthropic. 😈
– Young guys who sport Abraham Lincoln type beards because they think it makes them look arty when in reality it just makes them look like pretentious knobs.
– Ditto for guys who wear tweed flatcaps in reverse.
– People who wear sunglasses at night.
– Gym queens who will only use the piece of exercise equipment in front of the mirror.
– Anyone who has anything to do with poodles.
– Feminists who have had a bad day and want to argue with you despite the fact that you are agreeing with them.
I’ve been boozing it up since Christmas … I lllllike everrrryonnnnnne
Men/boys who wear the waistband of their pants around their thighs or knees. Pull your pants up, you look stupid. And to the man in the hunter green business skirt at the store, the slit goes in the BACK, and that particular skirt goes well with black high heels, not white high tops
People who think they know everything, who know nothing, who act like you know nothing, and feel the need to correct every thing that comes out of your mouth……..
People who think they are always right, who are seldom right, who think you are always wrong, and feel the need to correct everything that comes out of your mouth, or anyone else’s……
People who COMPLAIN….. that they can’t\don’t gain any weight no matter what they eat, or how much they eat……
People on the phone who won’t shut the fuck up and drive !
People who give bikers a hairy eyeball because of the loud pipes ……. hey, if ya got off the phone ( or stop whatever is distracting you from actually driving ) ya might be able to hear us coming.
People who think their shit don’t stink ………I have some sad news for you sunshine ……
My incredibly elegant and proper mother once spoke this regal little ditty, within earshot of her children. I was at most eight or nine, and have never forgotten it.
I’ve shat in England
I’ve shat in France
But before I’ld shit here
I’ld shit in my pants
*giggle* *snort* *run and scatter* MOM SAIIIID “SHIT” !!!!!!!!
~~~~~~~~
No way could I ever buy one of those things and put it on my head!!
I dislike
– People who endlessly complain all the time to the point of dysfunction. Yet they don’t do anything constructive. If complaint and misdirection was a hobby.
– People who will sit and watch a person / group work and not lift one finger themselves to help a greater cause.
Farfetched practical uses for Neutonian fluid
Kids toys. Moats,
Modern and smooth version of Quicksand. I am sure there are more.
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Damn straight. Add on to that, the boys with their pants around their freaking knees. Trust me, if I wanted to see your underwear, I’d ASK!
Also-
People who cannot control their children in public.
Cell phone drivers (more specifically, the one who almost hit me crossing the street the other day).
Slutty girls. And guys for that matter. I don’t care that you’ve slept with everyone you know, and I hope you get something itchy and contagious. And permanent.
On that note – Britney Spears, and any other millionaires that apparently can’t afford underwear. Or car seats for their children.
Ok, I think I’m done now…
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Notes:
1) Men who flaunt testosterone don’t have any, hence the Peacock’s Plume.
:limp:
2) It’s annoying, but Loud Pipes Save lives. If anyone else knows a Rider who’s been nearly killed because someone didn’t check a mirror and couldn’t hear the bike. I believe this as a person who has never owned a motorcycle and lived on the same street as a Harley dealer.
I DO Agree with you that it’s annoying and Abused, but there is a reason.
Your spot on with 3, 4, and 5.
I hope I don’t become 6, You “Rappaccini’s Daughter”!
Pudgy men who wear the dress pants that fit them three years ago.
Wedgie, anyone?
Male cameltoe?
:dead:
In regards to #1, any woman who wears knee-high boots that shouldn’t be. I think the boot should fit well over the leg, not like you’re wearing galoshes.
As for #2, people who try to turn while talking on a cell phone. I let a woman into the turn lane I was in from the right so she cold turn. Cell planted to left ear, right hand trying to slide itself around the steering wheel. Her attempts at trying to make the turn smooth and complete with one quick right hand rotation failed as she had to redo it at least four times to complete the turn.
#5: It’s unfortunate that humans are rarely every aware of their own odor, so the ones around them have to suffer at their unmindfulness. This doesn’t just go for body odor, but cologne/perfume as well.
A few of my own:
A) Those who “force you” to make a holiday wish list or get irritated when you don’t want anything (and you really don’t). Perhaps it’s just me, but it seems to make the whole holiday process more mechanical and cold than anything else.
B) People who reply to the question, “So, how are you?” with “God, just waiting for the weekend” when it’s Monday.
C) People who talk on their cell phones (or to me) in the restroom. At least give the person on the other end and those around you some courtesy.
D) People who wake you by barging into your room or banging on your door loudly. Waking up is a multi-step mental process; it’s not a light switch.
E) Drivers who try to avoid the line of traffic by speeding up the far side turn lanes only to “realize” it is a one-way only lane, so they try to squeeze in at the last second and stare at you waiting for you to respond in some way. Hell with ’em, should have been here.
F) Those who stop at green lights to read the street names. Figure out where you’re going before you enter a vehicle.
G) Those who don’t wipe their perspiration off the gym equipment.
H) The pretentious assholes who make their Starbucks or any other order so damned complicated it could be written down.
That’s plenty of whining for right now.
First of all Id like to thank Dave for saying people we dislike and not hate. Because hate is a very abused word. Saying you hate somebody is often just a way to express your dislike of the, While truthfully very few people trully hate other people.
People I dislike in no perticular order:
– That old woman that freaked me out by fondeling my crotch while I was in a pub in Trondheim ( she was atleast 40++).
– People who in general cant respect my personal space. Like people who talk like 10 cm away from my face and others who have the strange compulsion to touch my shoulder or whatever.
– People ahead of me in lines that pay in pocket change…
– People who think communism is a good idea or something to trive for.
– People from the western world who use the word inured in context with their own life.
– The person who designed airline seats ( Die you bastard)
– people without depth.
no point in going on since list to long
todays topics:
Shat:
Wtf… What kinda stupid ass name is that. Its like naming your daughter Agina. Just asking to get bad spins on it. SHAT! when its dirty only the A changes!
Pool thing….
Didnt buffer up for me so couldnt watch it…. odd
1. Drivers with cell phones, reading material, or food. It’s a car, not a restaurant, library, or phone booth. Pay attention and drive or get off the road; you are putting my life at risk and I don’t appreciate it.
2. Women who wait until they hear the total of their purchase before they open their purse to attempt to find their wallet and open it. You know that you will need your wallet regardless of the amount so be prepared to pay before the cashier gives you the total. Oh, and if it’s going to take you longer than 5 seconds to find and count out the exact change, don’t do it. We’re already rolling our eyes and looking at our watches while you’ve fumbled to get your purse off your shoulder, on to the counter, get the zipper open, find your wallet, open it, count your bills, and dig through the gum wrappers and other garbage at the bottom several times to try to find those last three pennies.
3. Rich, talentless celebrities and any of the mechanisms that help to promote them. I think this covers about 90% of the pop music “stars” under 30. People who download their music aren’t stealing; they’re just paying fair value for what they’re receiving.
4. People who park in handicap spaces or fire lanes and try to justify it because “I’m only going to be a few seconds”. Sorry dumbass, being egocentric, disrespectful, and breaking the law are not recognized handicaps but they do give me a burning desire to let the air out of your tires.
Ahhh, I’m feeling much better now. I’m going to grab a fresh cup of :java:
I dislike the kid at the movie theatre that puts lots of salt on when he makes popcorn. No consideration for kids and old folks that puke on too much salt. Yahoos craving the stuff over-salt anyway.
The guy in Australia that made a western hat style horse rider’s helmet, that isn’t selling the thing in the US.
The cop that writes one ticket a year for improper left-hand turns. Either enforce the law all the time and change the community, or stop picking on me.
My driver’s ed instructor. Mr. Van de Graaf taught me to pull up close to the car ahead when stopping at a red light. While much of the world seems to have also been told this lie (where does the law requiring 100-200 foot safe following distance, based on posted speed, say ‘except when bozo ahead slows or stops?!). The problem is that when the light changes the time spent un-stacking the parked cars with no distance between them consumes all kinds of time, and causes most urban congestion. Same thing about stop-and-go traffic. The wackoes approaching the car ahead are the 2nd major contributing reason for stop and go traffic, the first being kamikazees that hazard other vehicles causing the other driver to flinch. Flinches are the cause of stop-and-go traffic, as they ripple back through following cars, getting worse with each repetition. Leaving more space reduces the problem of the flinch, but you have to shoot the kamikazees that don’t leave legal following distance separation behind them when they change lanes.
i have rutger hauer, darryl hannah, joanna cassidy, brion james and sean young preserved in large vats of non-newtonian fluid in my basement. harrison ford and edward james olmos will never find them.
i dislike wait staff that need to let me know they have, what they think, is a personality.
i can think of a use for the shat. wiping something with itself would be fun.
I dislike:
~ coworkers who are in no way superior to me that say “the coffee pot is empty” or “there’s no paper in the printer”. see those things on the ends of your arms? perfectly capable hands, is what they are. it’s not multiple choice, asshat.
~ people who exceed the weight limit of their stretchy-jeans or tiny t-shirts or whatever. i know dieting and exercising can be difficult, but if you refuse to put forth the effort, please do not flaunt your uglies for us all to see. :limp:
~ customers who come in and think they know more about my job than i do.
~ customers who come in here at lunch time, thinking i should work through mine so that they can run their errands.
~ people that complain uselessly, like about their height or the weather. 😕
Here is my list:
1. Women who wear no makeup and polyester pants who give me the evil eye for wearing makeup and clothing from this decade. Yes, I guess compared to you, I might look risque. It’s called fashion. Google it or something.
2. I absolutely agree w/the “people who talk in bathrooms.” Unless you’re out of TP or having a heart attack…pretty sure it can wait until your pants are back on.
3. People who leave voice mail messages after business hours, then call at the exact MINUTE the office opens the next day to complain that “I called yesterday and no one called me back.” Easy, killer– no one was here at 9 PM.
4. Nasty, germy folks who leave the bathroom without washing their hands.
5. Especially when you see them later in a meeting, and they want to shake hands.
6. That weird person who has to sit either RIGHT next to you or DIRECTLY in front of you in a nearly empty movie theater. Why, why WHY???
7. Drivers who ride the brake constantly. Your car has (at least) two pedals. If you use them both correctly, the brake light won’t always be on. I see that and think you’re lost, drunk, retarded, or all of the above.
8. People who let their kids wander ahead of them in the checkout line at the grocery store, then talk to them around the other people in between. If you’re behind me in line, and your shit is behind mine on the conveyor, keep your brat back there, too. I don’t care if “Grampa Joe is gonna love those walnuts, dontcha think.” Leave me out of your conversation and get your kid outta the way, or I will whack your little ray of sunshine with a rolled-up Cosmo like he’s a wayward puppy.
9. People who make eye contact for WAY too long without blinking.
The creators of these crappy new childrens cartoons. Bring back Jem and the Holograms and He-man! Please!
Those people who didn’t provide enough chocolaty treats over the holidays. I only got one chocolate bar in my stocking and you’re serving banana cream pie? Where’s the Lindor chocolate truffles?
People I dislike:
-People who come to the counter and continue asking questions over and over even though we’ve already told them we don’t handle those situations…”Sorry we don’t have restraining order information, you have to contact district court for that.” “Well, how much is it gonna be, what’s gonna happen to him/her if I file…” AAAAARRRRGGGGHHH!!!! 👿
-People who call the office and automatically start yelling and blaming you for something only to find out that they’ve called the wrong number… ❓
-People who take offense over the most minute comment or action and make a mountain out of an anthill about it. “I had white people food yesterday, it was good.” 😳 “You shouldn’t say stuff like that, it’s offensive and racial.” My best friend in the whole world knows she’s white and she’s ok with that. 😛 And when she comes over to my house she has Mexican food…I know I’m mexican and I’m fine with that too. :wtf:
-Definitely people who wear their pants below their underwear. :wtf: I’ve asked every female I know if they find saggy guys attractive. Answer was a thundering !NO! 👿 For girls: Though I think a :thong: coming out over jeans or a mini skirt is sexy :wang: , the g-string just makes me think, that poor girl’s gonna get a bacterial infection :limp:.
-Girls who weigh 85-120 lbs who are on diets because they are soooo fat. 🙄 I feel so sorry for them that I want to take them home and feed them quarter pounders ’till they look healthy again. Guys who work out and have muscles but are still stick thin that they look like a buff skeleton walking around. :wtf:
Bonus: Guys who openly, incessantly brag about how big their d**k is, how good they are in bed, how if you gave them a try you’d come back begging for more and they’d make all your dreams come true. :puke: First: 99.8% of the time it’s all talk and you know someone who tried it and gave them a BDR (Bad D**k Report) and The .1% of the time that it may be true, you’re so disgusted by his arrogance that you don’t really care or are completely turned off 🙁 . And .1% of the time it doesn’t matter what he says, you just want some ass! 😈
(Hey! Don’t judge! Girls have primal needs too!) :kiss:
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and sometimes, my sister just likes being a tad smart-assy
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Thank you Mitch, I never looked at motorcycle pipes like that before…….makes a lot of sense now
Hey DAVE! Did you get that website finished yet?
1. People who email me a web page link to anything, anywhere, at any time for any reason. I have already seen the entire Internet twice and can find everything on my own, thank you.
2. People who try to take the braindead plotless yawn-spasm-inducing Matrix series and try to rationalize why they love it with some religious mumbo-jumbo. I have a better story explanation: It sucked turkey :wang:.
3. People who feel they can get away with posting the most psychotic hate-speech on the Internet and then cover their asses with “It was satire. Don’t take it seriously.” It very obviously wasn’t.
4. Pharmaceutical companies who wally around patenting their cures before they even finish testing them. There’s a potential cure for cancer out there today, and their only thought is “How can we squeeze the last dime out of people who will die without our product?”
5. People who complain that anything at all is too hard to learn. Either learn it or don’t do it. Don’t insist on doing it and also insist that the Universe rearrange itself to be more convenient for you.
See, this is why I usually don’t pipe up in the “people I can’t stand” category. All it does is bend my keyboard… And I agree with everybody else: Yeah! Me too! Those too!
Oh, and Dave, as for #4, tell them to post their job on Rent-A-Coder. I see ten “Clone this site for me” type jobs on there per day – and never touch them – but it’d tell them where to go. 👿 Unless, of course, you’d do it yourself and charge a fee which is donatable to the Lucimi church.
Business men who wear slacks that fit them three years and twenty pounds ago.
It makes them look like they have a nice fluffy feminine ass.
:dead:
Re: brad k-driver’s ed- My instructor traumatized us by saying that each orange cone was one of his children and every time we hit one we were killing his children (needless to say I passed with flying colors) so now every time a see an orange cone, tossed, crushed, squashed, broken, etc…I get very sad and think “Oh 🙁 another one of Bob’s Children got killed.” ❓
Re: spanky-1- Along with everything else that we may do that raises an eyebrow. I think they’re just jealous. 😆
Re: meagan-cartoons- I’d be happy just to be able to watch Looney Toons without cable or satelite requirement…
Re: Cellphones- Guests that come visit me in my house but spend their entire time on a cellphone talking to someone else…
My deepest apologies, Dave! Your religion is Lucumi, not “Lucimi” as I’ve been calling it.
I found the Wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lucumi
followig a car that did not look like there was a driver in it ,going around and seeing the 16 year old driver that must have been 4 foot nothing on a cell phone in the passing lane at 25 miles an hour under the speed limit.
Driving
People that don’t know how to merge properly.
People that pull out right as you drive by and your in the middle lane.
They look like they are going to hit you. They can’t wait a whole second for you to pass.
People I Dislike:
Folks who claim to be fans of a team no matter how that team performs or rip you for being a “fair-weather fan”. As a fan, I put as much effort into being a good fan as the team puts into being a good team!
People who think they are doing the right thing by pulling over to the side of the road to yack on their cell phone, especially the moron who pulls over just on the crest of a hill so that you don’t see them until you are right on them. Coming upon them while fighting the glare of a dawn or dusk sun makes it that much more of a life-or-death-scare-the-crap-outta-you adventure as well. Add to that the fact that they are exactly 125 yards from a Wal*Mart parking lot makes for a blind rage ride that the whole family can enjoy!
1. The person who uses your pkone and leaves either makeup or thier “eau de yuck”
perfume on the receiver.
2.The a**hole driving behind me in the Dodge Ram, look I don’t care if it has a “Hemi”
if there are vehicles in front of me I just can’t go any faster and I won’t get out of your way! So stop weaving so that you can shine your stupid headlights in my side mirror! (that felt good)
3.That woman in the office who believes she is channeling Emily Post. No matter how superior you think you are it’s never classy or polite to point out others (or what you feel are) faux pas, out loud in front of everyone too embarass someone.
4. The person who leaves a trace amount of coffee in the coffee maker in the office that allows a vile burnt coffee smell to permeate the entire office.
Everyone should believe in something
After reading all of the above
I believe I’ll have another drink
-guys who wear their pants at their knees, i really don’t want to see your ass
-people who’s cell phones go off in class. i don’t have one, but it cant be that hard to put it on silent
-high school guys who think that their stringy moustaches look really hot
-people who stop in the middle of a crowded hallway to talk to their friends
People who ignore the personal space thing way too much. 1″ from my face bluhhh.
Minnie? Apparently it’s also sometimes fun to be a tad patronising.
non-Newtonian fluid? So that’s how Jesus did it! I always thought it was the sandals!
Dave – Judging from the heated responses, I believe you’ve touched some very raw nerves. “Can’t we all just get along?” Thanks to Rodney King for that one. Also used by His Jackness in MARS ATTACKS
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Can’t we all just get a gun? That would induce politeness much quicker.
Has anyone mentioned anything about tailgaters yet? ‘Cause those people drive me nuts!!! Back off, a-hole, I’m doing the speed limit!
Totally agree with Megan on the tail gater thing – back off! Or whoever does the voice – I think it is the same person, that you get on the recorded messages for the phone co., electric co., cable co, every utility in the world. Because when I get that I know I am never going to talk to a real person. Or men who call me honey or sweetie when we just met – I’m not your honey and for that I thank God!
1. Little boys with their pants halfway down their ass. If you want to show off your business, wear a skirt. Otherwise buy a damn belt.
2. Large women who wear crop tops and have a roll of flesh that hangs over their pants. It doesn’t make you look cute. If you had eyes on the back of your head, you would see the looks you’re getting from everyone behind you. You can still be large and sexy by wearing something that fits you, but the “Muffin Top” is not sexy.
3. If I’m driving the speed limit or some other appropriate speed and I can only see you from the wiper blades up, you’re close to penetration. Back off!
4. Turn off the damn cell phone and enjoy the silence once in a while. Nothing in your life can be so important that you have to have that damn thing glued to your face all day.
It’s annoying, but Loud Pipes Save lives.
Skilled riders who are aware of their surroundings save lives.
C’mon now, do you really think that yahoo in the H2 with the windows rolled up, AC on, bass boost blasting can hear anything outside?
Want to stay alive near this fellow? Don’t be next to him, don’t be in his blind spot, give yourself an out. Scan the road, Identify problems, Predict possible incidents and Decide what you’re gonna do before it happens. That’s what will consistently save your bacon when you’re riding a bike and the folks around you are in those ‘shiny metal boxes’.
If folks riding the loud bikes really were doing it for safety, then they’d also be wearing proper riding gear AND a high quality FULL FACE helmet. 😈
‘Nuff said.
Thank you, Penguin Pete, for the comment about the wretched and
abominable Matrix films. Unbelievable that people claim to understand
them. :puke: :puke: :dead: 😈 👿 😕 :wtf:
Ducatisti I have to say that I don’t ride but I like bikes from a design standpoint. They are cool and I like the sleek modern ones. Straight (empty) pipes also have a performance advantage and are stock (on all) on a Harley. I do industrial machine design (not cars or bikes). You were speaking my language before. To answer your question .005″ clearance .0005″ coating leaves .0045″ clearance in places where the liquid coat will sit. it is allot Like plating. (Sorry not enough humor here.)
I try to respect the space distance on the road. it is good advice.
regards Gromit
clarification: sorry I meant plaiting (as in chrome plaiting).
Plaiting is what you do to hair.
Plating is the word you’re looking for.
Harley (and all modern motorcycles) do have internal baffle systems in the stock mufflers. It is required by law. The baffles can sometimes be removed, which will increase dB level, but usually decrease overall performance (unless other radical internal mods are done).
The external look of these systems may fool the layman into thinking there is not internal componentry, but it’s just a “look” that is currently popular with the v-twin crowd.
If you’d like to see what a true performance exhaust system looks like, check out modern sportbikes. More power with half the cc’s of an American V-Twin, and a very large cannister muffler.
Sorry, but this is what I do for a living.
Back to Davezilla and more humor!
– Talk show hosts that only want to hear themselves talk
– Radio station “DJs” that play the same crap over and over
– Ad executives that are sure I am so stupid that I would buy a Star as a wedding present
– People that hate their jobs so they take it out on me
– Managers that do not know your job but tell you what to do
– If you are hot and you are showing off, I might stare. Don’t like it? Not my problem!
– If you are not hot and you are showing off, more power to ya but when I puke on your shoes, deal with it
– People allergic to soap and toothpaste.
– Politicians that spend all their time bashing their opponents but never tell you what they are planning to do. Not that they are actually going to do it anyways.
– People that come to work sick as if the company would fold if they called in sick
– Managers that give you a hard time for calling in sick so people come to work sick
– Doctors that do nothing for you and then send you to work sick
– Specialists that make you wait three months for an appointment so that by the time you get there, the problem is either gone or so bad that now it can’t be fixed
– Dentists in a rush
– the person that stole my stapler!
You are good at it and you are very skilled.
femals who think it’s peachy kine to bring children into this wourld knowning the family will take care of them for them if they don’t just so they can bitch about life with a child being so hard and never taking care of them herself everyone else dose
men like my man who likes to turn you on relly bad then end up leaving and not even tempting to switch from four play to sex till they come home latter and your in bed and not in the mood anymore 👿
– If you are hot and you are showing off, I might stare. Don’t like it? Not my problem!
– If you are not hot and you are showing off, more power to ya but when I puke on your shoes, deal with it
Perfect!!!.
People I dislike:
Complainers who have the same problem over and over again. They don’t want a solution. If they did, they would’ve taken the advice of all of their friends and been done with it years ago. No, they want to bitch. It’s easier.
Rich people who don’t understand how the average person can’t spend a fortune on something. Neighbor: “You turn your heat down to 63? Gosh I couldn’t live that way. The first thing I did when I moved into my house is replace the furnace and all of the ductwork.” Lisa: “How much did that set you back?” Neighbor: “Oh, about $10k…but it was worth it. Now, my heating bills are only $500 a month.” Only? Oh, yeah, right….you’re rich and have money to burn. As for me, I’ll put on a third sweatshirt so I can afford gas to get to work.
Perma-tan people: No, I don’t think going to the fake bake would make me feel better, thanks for asking.
The Ultra Organizers: It’s really great how you take hours to organize your refrigerator magnets by color and alphabetize your coupons…but I don’t care if I can’t find my Easter cake plate until Easter comes along. And that’s MONTHS from now. Call me in March.
The Fashionistas: Even if it has this terrific name-brand tag on it and it’s on sale, it’s still a sweat suit and I’m not going to spend $149 on a sweat suit when I can get one at Wal-Mart for $18.99. You’re right. I’m never going to get it. Now, piss off.
This isn’t exactly “People I Dislike” because I know their intentions are good But: People who want to help push my wheelchair through a doorway and keep banging the handrail into the door frame, and they don’t know that I often have to hop my front wheels over the doorjamb. I know they want to help but just holding the door open would be great.
I’m new here but I love it!
People I dislike are the ones that sit right next to you in a public bathroom where there are 20 stalls and the other 19 are empty. Am I the only one?