Guide to Artists’ Models No. 2: The Nudist

Guide to Artists’ Models No. 2: The Nudist
Nude Model No. 2,The NudistSecond only in popularity to The Earth Mother, The Nudist is usually an elderly gentleman, with a silver ponytail collected from his few remaining strands of hair. His buttocks are withered as raisins and his hairy stomach hangs from him like a weaverbird nest.

The Nudist loves the outdoors and finds no greater pleasure than sunbathing on the front lawn, while waving casually to his astonished neighbors. He’s retired from his corporate job and now spends his days making wine in his basement in the nude, reading “Naturist” magazines while nude, and riding his Harley, in the nude.

Quotes:

  1. “Pretty young thing like you confined in all that clothing. It ain’t natural.”
  2. “Course, me and my ladyfriend still have sex from time to time. We did it last night on the bench you’re sitting on.”
  3. “How’s the Cabernet? You know I was nude when I made that.”
  4. “I’m just trying to get back to Eden. Fruits, nuts and nude folk. How God intended it.”
  5. “I know your aunt! We shared a hot tub up north. Nude.”
chevron_left
chevron_right

Join the conversation

comment 34 comments
  • Sir Osiss

    Good Lord, that’s a nasty crack! It seems the Nudist probably suffers from the dreaded Dik-Du disease. (His belly sticks out, further than his Dik-Du) :limp: Also most likely a naturalist because of Dunlap (His gut Dunlapped over his belt)

  • motleygirl12

    :boxers: i dont mean to be rude but yo butt is pretty stanky :dead:

  • Esther

    Dave, I think my eggs just went into retirement after seeing this.:neutral:

  • Anna

    “To be nude or Not to be nude, That’s the Question”.

  • Esther

    I would have say that in this case, the answer would be an unequivocal “negatory, good buddy!”:dead:

  • frisko

    He looks like he is performing Shakespear…”To be or not to be…” eew

  • Sir Osiss

    Shakespeare, yes. But I think the pose is more like “Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio

    On second thought the line ought to be from Lear, “Nothing can come of [wearing] nothing

  • JFLY

    Crack kills, Dave…:dead:

    But the Rap Lyrics Translations were hysterical 😀

  • Ace

    Hubba hubba! That is one sexy pony tail. How about bringing your fine self on this way.

  • Stephanie

    Me thinks he doth protest clotes too much.

  • mitch smith

    :boxers: Yes, as you can see even my stretch marks have stretch marks.

  • Spud

    Brilliant drawings dave, terrific, laughing long at this series.

    🙂

  • Craig

    Love the “dickey do.” ( That’s when your belly sticks out further than your dickey do):limp:

  • Minnie

    I’m truly loving this series. It reminds me of some of the more “memorable” models I encountered in art school.

    I bet this guy had a bunch of faded tattoos down his thighs and back, too.

  • misskitty

    You’re killin’ us dave! But thank you for not subjecting us to the front view Oh I can only imagine!:razz:

  • Cherish

    OK… I am now convinced that every male nude model in the world is trained in the “one foot forward, one arm extended” pose.

    Followed by “other foot forward, two arms extended”

    Followed by…

    “one foot forward, one hand on hip”

  • Nina

    :dead: :dead: :dead:

  • rust

    I see you have met my father…

  • Sir Osiss

    rust- I”m your father?! :wtf:

  • Lula

    :roll:If being nude is what makes you happy then hey go for it.

  • Nikki

    Sean Connery has really let himself go.

  • dougieace

    hey nikki thats george carlon,saw him a few weeks ago in dayton.that old man is still funny.

  • Mandy

    Dave, you never told us you were a nude model! 😛

    just kidding :kiss:

  • Christall

    O.K. Who took the cheap shot of Willy Nelson. and by the way the neighbors cat your looking for, look no more if you look close enough you can see it stuck in the nudist’s butt crack.

  • logan

    😕 it burs us it burs us why does master have to be so cruel:dead:

  • logan

    wtf is up with that:eek:

  • Carl

    This is why people have sex in the dark.

  • Mandy

    Sex in the dark? But you don’t get to see the :wang: and :boobs::boobs:. What’s the point? 😛

  • Marcus

    :razz:Yes, a cup of tea would be quite nice. This is a beautiful print of “Nude descending a staircase” It’s what I do every morning.:wtf:

  • rust

    father… father…!

    *son!* *wheeze*

  • Sir Osiss

    yes…Luke…search your feelings…dang, I mean rust…my bad! :geek:

  • mYstEryGirL

    can you say ‘scared for life?’:-?

  • GentleRose

    ❗ i agree that definately *scar’d* me almost enough to not ever stay married long enough for my old man to get that ugly

  • Paige

    AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:wtf:

Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: