Overheard: Carpet Cleaners Edition

Carpet Cleaner #1: “Dude, you ever been to Screaming Eagle Casino?”
Carpet Cleaner #2: “Do you mean, Soaring Eagle?”
CC #1: “Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaah, that one. I been there last week and I wasn’t s’pposed to be cause I’m on probation still.”
CC #2: “What the Hell for?
CC #1: “Oh, my ole lady turn me in cause I shit in her sock.”
CC #2: “The Hell. Just for that?
CC #2: “Wait. This the same broad that made you a cake outta watermelon?”
CC #1: “No, this is another one. Jill, man. I’ll shit in her sock again tonight if she don’t shut up.”


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26 responses

  1. ariel Avatar
    ariel

    why in the world would someone paint fox news on their teeth?

    and just what could they charge you with for shitting in your wife’s sock?

  2. tinamarie Avatar
    tinamarie

    Assock and battery???

  3. Assault and shattery????

  4. Spud Avatar
    Spud

    The sad part is, they see no wrong, no error.

  5. That would be an amusing rap sheet.

  6. And “shitting in a sock” is a euphemism for what…?”

  7. nina Avatar
    nina

    :wtf:
    It sounds like this guy has a thing for the strange & not so bright women! Then again he doesn’t sound like a winner either!

    😕 How in the world do you make cake out of Watermelon?

  8. So, this guy actually umm… must have held a sock to his butt and let loose a turd into it. ❗

    I dread to think CC #1’s stocking-stuffers this Christmas.

    Oh, the visuals. Ugh, I can’t get the image out of my head. I feel queasy. 😕

  9. Paige Dalton Avatar
    Paige Dalton

    Im confused- How do you make a cake out of watermelon??????????????
    :wtf:

  10. Sir Osiss Avatar
    Sir Osiss

    At least he did not put a watermelon in her sock and make a cake out of…:-?

    How’s THAT for a visual, Minnie?!:sad:

  11. Julie Avatar
    Julie

    http://www.funroom.com/summer/wtrmlncake.html For those of you who really want to know how…:roll:

  12. Maybe later I’ll figure out why I decided to read this during breakfast.:razz:

  13. I dunno. Whatyousmellin’ Cake. Poop Chutes. Shit Socks. Crap Bearing Rodents. What’s next? Oh Henry bars floating in Puke Soup?

    Sigh.

  14. MIKE Avatar
    MIKE

    What does someone do to make you shit in a sock?

  15. What kind of carpet cleaner was that? :wtf:

  16. Pappy Avatar
    Pappy

    How do you think she found out? Think she just smelled it or she just stuck her foot in it.

    The latter is funnier. 😀

  17. Daria Avatar
    Daria

    not the kind of people I would want in my house cleaning my carpets

  18. OK, that’s it. I had dry heaves just now. For real. 😕

    Thank you, Sir Osiss and Pappy. 😛

  19. betina Avatar
    betina

    Perhaps he did it in FRONT of her, then she started chasing him, so he had to crap while on the run, holding the sock to his anus.

  20. Sir Osiss Avatar
    Sir Osiss

    Sorry Minnie. Not a very auspicious begining for me here, huh? 🙄

  21. OK…let me see if I understand this correctly: Making a strange cake induces certain scatting behaviors from recipient.

    So tell me Dave, did Grandma have to hide her support hose?

  22. chainstay Avatar
    chainstay

    How’s this for a visual, perhaps he attempted
    to do the deed while she was wearing said sock

  23. Mandy Avatar
    Mandy

    Thanks, chainstay. You’ve successfully destroyed any remaining shred of innocence left in me. :dead:

  24. chainstay Avatar
    chainstay

    You’ve got to admit,
    THAT would justify
    judical involvement

  25. Sir Osiss Avatar
    Sir Osiss

    Adds a whole new definition of a “shitheel,” don’t it? 🙄

  26. Mandy Avatar
    Mandy

    What a crappy thing to do!

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