Little things mean a lot

Ever notice that littlest things can be the most annoying? For example:

  1. Eating a decent bowl of clam chowder and suddenly biting into sand
  2. Walking through a yard and getting a single strand of spiderweb across your cheek, which means you will be feeling the damned thing for the next two hours
  3. Watching someone speak at a luncheon, and noticing they have a piece of corn dangling from their beard that doesn’t have the good graces to fall off on its own
  4. Talking to a drop dead gorgeous woman who has a lazy eye
  5. Hearing a mosquito in the bedroom after you’ve just fallen asleep. Turning the light on and seeing nothing. Turning the light back out and hearing the winged bastard inches from your face
  6. Eating scrambled eggs and crunching down on eggshell
  7. Smelling something foul in the room, but as you try to locate the source, it seems to be impossible to trace
  8. Feeling an ant on your hand. Worse is finding two ants, which means you might as well have 70
  9. Getting shot by the Vice-President
  10. What little things are bothering you?
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  1. JFLY

    1. A single hair stuck in a bar of soap
    2. One elusive “ground” of coffee floating in your cup
    3. Those little amoebas that swim across your eyes (where the hell do they come from and where do they go?)
    4. The tip of a toothpick that has broken off between your teeth, forcing you to use yet another toothpick which follows suit
    5. That stupid ring that all the really wonderful men seem to be wearing on their left hand
    6. A single feather that has poked its way through your down pillow, but is impossible to pluck out
    7. A pinhole in an otherwise perfect cigarette
    8. ASL PLZ…
    9. DJ’s who talk through the first and last few bars of a song (same guys who fail to tell you who the band was when you’re dying to know, but always announce the obvious ones)
    10. Grocery shopping for all the ingredients for tonight’s dinner, only to discover that the store is out of the last ingredient you look for (which is always an essential one)

  2. Rhonda

    JFLY… 1-10, you’ve hit the nail on the head!

  3. I thought I was the only one who got sand in their clam chowder. Now I know I don’t suffer alone. Is there a support group I can join? 😐

  4. Trey

    1. That hair that you notice when you’re half way done with your hash browns.
    2. The static you during silence hear after a long concert that doesn’t allow you to sleep easily
    3. Those moments of Incompatibility with humanity
    4. Any place that isn’t open at 3am
    5. Cherry cough syrup or anything that tastes remotely like it
    6. People that just don’t understand at all
    7. Remembering what you needed to do right after it’s too late
    8. When one line of a song gets stuck in your head
    9. When you can’t figure out the song that is stuck in your head.
    10. Radicals… any of them.

    And I completely agree with the sand in the clam chowder thing… I hate that.

  5. Doug Greene

    1. Putting on a perfectly new pair of white athletic socks, and being unable to get the heel and toe exactly right on your foot.
    2. Ordering your favorite coffee drink, driving away, and then discovering that it is barely room temerature.
    3. Watching a TV talk show or news show in which someone repeatedly mispronounces a word.
    4. An icy cold drop of rain or melted snow that magically finds the fraction of an inch between your nech and your collar.
    5. Noticing later in the day that you have missed a aspirin tablet sized spot of hair on your face when you shaved this morning.

  6. Alex

    JFLY, I wear one those stupid rings. Thank you for calling me wonderful.

  7. Night Queen

    Trying to tell someone they left their turn signal on, and they don’t have enough sense to roll down the window to try to hear you. Then you resort to getting in front of them and flip your turns signals from one side to the other, and……..they just……..don’t………get it. 🙄 ❓

  8. 1.The Bank machine beeping endlessly until u remove your card.
    2.He forgot again to put the toilet seat down.
    3.The cover left off the tooth paste.
    4.Someone stepping out of the shower soak and wet and you walk into the puddle after you are already dressed.
    5.They didn’t spray the bathroom,yuck!!!
    6.The remaining glass of juice that that they stuck in the fridge and never go back to and it ends up dumped all through the rest of the fridge.
    7.When you’re watching a real good movie and someone says something at a real good part of the movie.
    8.People that talk too much when I am trying to wake up.

  9. mitch

    I’m going to try and do this without mentioning my intense hatred of Republicans, since it upset some folks yesterday.
    1. People who bring rowdy, obnoxious kids to movies.
    2. Finding you have more cereal than milk left.
    3. a great book that has a lousy ending
    4. people who have forgotten what an accelerator is for.
    5. TV ministers.

  10. Putzfactor

    Blog hosts who think they’re funny when they’re not . . . really.

  11. People who act surprised when they finout they have to pay for merchandise.

    The people who park with us because we have doggie treats.

  12. Pappy

    Topless Sandals.

  13. Craig

    [Comment ID #24089 will be quoted here] I was just having some fun with you yesterday mitch, no hard feelings


  14. Da Popster

    11. Sanctimonious Republicans telling us how well we are doing. :puke:

  15. ssterchaos

    [Comment ID #24075 will be quoted here]

    I thought I was the only one who saw those amoebas! What in the hell are they, exactly?

    1. Husbands that come in drunk at 3am, scream at the dog to bite the cat for about 15 minutes, then come to bed and wonder why the dog won’t be still.
    2. Old ladies who wear excessive amounts of perfume that doesn’t even smell good.
    3. People who are rude for the sake of being rude.
    4. Watching something good in HD when all of a sudden the signal drops.
    5. People who talk during movies.
    6. That popcorn kernel that takes months to work it’s way out of the backside of your molar.
    7. Stabbing yourself in the eye with mascara.
    8. Throwing out 3 bras and 5 pairs of socks in the same week.
    9. Bad sex.
    10. Republicans.

  16. Patrick

    1. People who feel the need to fill the gaps in their insipid conversations with “You know what I mean”, “You know what I’m saying”, or my personal worst “Ummmm”. I have a college education. If I don’t know what you mean, I’ll ask. If you’re speaking English I will know what you’re saying. “Ummm” just tells me you’re talking out of your ass and have no idea where your own conversation is going!
    2. That popcorn husk that gets stuck on the back of my tongue. More often than not when on a date at the movies.
    3. The lazy SOBs at the college radio station that won’t tend to the internet server in order to keep the radio signal transmitting consistently. KUAF Arkansawyers.
    4. People who don’t turn off their cell phones in the theater even after they see the dancing soda cup telling them to AND THEN having such an exaggerated sens ofself-importance that it’s okay to answer the damn call and remain in the theater.
    5. Going to a home you’ve never been to before and finding a flea. I promise you will be scratching pseudo-fleas (my term) for the remainder of your stay!
    6. Women who think it is totally incumbent upon the male species to care for the toilet seat. If I need it up, I’ll put it up. If I need it down, I’ll put it down. You do the same. If we both agree to put the lid and seat down all the time, fine with me. Otherwise, open your eyes and catch a clue.
    7. Being lied to consistently by the single most powerful man in the free world and then being told by everyone around him that he’s telling the truth no matter how many sources of credible reporting indicate otherwise. AND the fact that he’s been a failure at every business venture he’s ever been involved in previously and was no better than a C- student in college, pledging Tappa Kegga Bru.
    8. When I miss the last fifteen minutes of a program I Tivo’d because something previously ran long and everything after started late.
    9. That thing in the bottom of the crisper drawer in the refrigerator that evolved into some other life form before it then evolved again into something slimy and liquid.
    10. That movie that NEVER gets better all the way through the end. I WASTED TWO HOURS OF MY LIFE ON THAT PIECE OF CRAP you dullards!

    FYI re: Dave’s #7- If you can’t locate the source of the foul smell, it’s probably you, isn’t it?

  17. Ron

    1. People that don’t drive at least the posted speed limit. Just because you don’t have anywhere to go in a hurry, doesn’t mean the person behind isn’t. 2. People who think that they are the only one in the store, and either stand in the middlle of the isleand don’t move, or walk in front of you while your looking at somethingand dont pardon themselves (its just rude). 3.Eating p*ssy and getting a hair stuck in the back of your throat.

  18. The amoebas are called “eye floaters” (ew). Google that one.

  19. Patrick

    Ron, #3 allows you to play that famous game (or is it just me?) “Straight or curly”?

  20. Daria

    1. People who mispronounce Nevada.
    2. Getting behind someone in the left lane who won’t go the speed limit and when you pull to the right to pass them suddenly they think it’s a race.
    3. Reaching into a new bag of potatoes and getting a slimey one.

  21. People that use the word ‘irregardless’ :wtf:

  22. cappy318

    1. sneezing after apply mascara {racoon eyes} that buy penis extender cars and think they look hot
    3. women with bad wigs {especially if they don’t wash them}
    4. people you don’t know well who actually think you’re interested in their personal life

  23. jayray

    1. that piece of hair or fuzz that mysteriously got on the back of your tounge causing you to scratch , cough , or gag uncontrollably
    2. the guy who keeps talking knowing that your just being nice and are trying to walk away
    3. taking your shoes off at the end of a long day and realize you have a holie sock
    4. getting to work and just now realizing that your socks dont match
    5. having toothpaste on your face, and nobody bothered to point it out to you!!
    6. wet towel left on the bed!!
    7. people who know they arent coming back, yet insist on getting your business card
    7. some old lady a a restaraunt, sits at the table next to you, and insists on blowing her nose, right in front of everyone
    8. someone chewing with their mouth open(gross)
    9. people in my seat at the game, knowing that seat doesnt match their ticket!!
    10. when you hit the stapeler 5 times only to finally realize, “shit, im out of staples”

    and finally

    11. people who dont deserve it or need it, hitting the fuckin lottery!!

  24. Sandy

    Running to smoke a cigarette on your 15 min break and realizing you left them in your locker 10 minutes away.
    Trying to clock out to go home and a line of customers suddenly needing your
    Eating your reheated lunch and getting to the middle that didn’t get heated.
    Waiting for your boyfriend who is never on time or in a hurry when it comes to you.

  25. starhealer

    1 people who have to let you know that they know every thing when they know nothing

    2 the guy netdoor who alwasy has to ask for some thing when you a mowing the lawn i cant hear you go away

    3 some one taking the last :java: and not making more

    4 men who leve the seet up just to piss me off in the middle of the night 👿

  26. The way the news insults the hell out of me. What happened to objective reporting? Now they report an obvious story and then TELL me what I’m supposed to think about it. (Oh wait. You mean there are other channels besides FOXNews?)

  27. Patrick

    memo to “W”- it’s Nu cle ar, not nuke u lar, you dope”. You can’t criticize it if you can’t even pronounce it.

  28. Ace

    Amoebas? Eye floaters? Thank god I’m not the only one! I thought I was hallucinating things and coming closer to insanity.

    1. Finding hair in the drain form the person who showered before you when you have told them numerous times to pick it up. Gross, dude!
    2. having tons of cable channels and finding nothing to watch
    3. Putting cream on your face because it felt dry but now feels too greasy.
    4. when the day can’t decide whether its going to be hot or cold.
    5. the whole inside the bottom of your shoe that you just can’t leave alone which you make even bigger
    6. trying to hit the backspace button but accidentally hitting the equal sign button instead thus making you go back to correct even more errors
    7. trying to cough up flem but the little bitch won’t budge
    8. cold feet that are somehow manage to be sweaty
    9. findig out there is only little bit of toilet paper once you are done with your buisness and now having to decide how to use it wisely
    10. an itch on your back that you either can’t reach or can’t seem to locate the exact location of

  29. 1. People who re-post news on a website without providing any of their insight or opinion and calling it a blog. If I WANT the news I can find it dumbass.
    2. People who have to be the noisiest, most obnoxious person in a crowd, walking down the street, in a mall, etc.
    3. People who wear clothes that are cute on little people, but they, themselves are NOT little.
    4. Stubbing my toe on something I asked my husband to put away.
    5. People who are constantly telling me what they think I should do (quit smoking, drive slower, stop watching porn).
    6. People who complain about the weather.
    7. People who spit food on you when they’re talking.
    8. People who have no idea they have BO.
    9. People who are so obsessed with one topic that they cannot talk about anything else.
    10. When my dog has a dingle berry hanging.

  30. laceylegacey

    Amen to the pinhole in your cigrette
    1People who ramble on and on or jump from one subject to another without actually completing a thought
    2 Always getting stuck sitting next to the old people in a resturant that want to talk at top volume about their sex life…EWWWW!!!! :wtf: :puke:
    3 Finding my brother in laws dirty clothes on the kitchen table
    4 Catching the last 2 minutes of your favorite movie on tv.
    5 Finding the last jug of milk in the fridge empty especially when you have nothing left to put in your coffee
    6 Finding that your husband has worn your socks and stretched them out.
    7 leaving your house clen and coming home 2 hours later and it looks like you hosted a frat party.
    8 When my dog chews or pisses on my best pair of shoes
    9 when my husband swears he can’t find something and wakes me up to find it and it was RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM!!!!!
    10 Parents who let their 10 year olds have cell phones and wander the streets at two o clock in the morning 🙁

  31. Spud

    Hard to elaborate on anything trivial after all these fine posts.

    However, a couple of things

    1. Getting in the shower to find no soap.
    2. Nailing yourself with a nail gun.
    3. Having your “new” heavy duty rubber gloves leak whilst clearing a blocked sewer drain.
    4. Plunging a sewer pipe only to have the back pressure blow it all over you at 7.30am.
    5. Getting in the shower to find no soap


  32. Ron

    1.People who let their kids puh the shopping cart ! 2.Those who think they know everything, really piss off those of us that do. 3.stupid drivers!

  33. Steppenwolf

    Checking out Davezilla first thing in the morning and reading a dumbass comment from the previous day…then realizing it’s your post. ❓

  34. Becky

    1. People who scrape their forks on their teeth.
    2. People who scrape their forks, knives etc on their plates.
    3. People who park in handicapped spots then RUN to their cars to avoid rain.
    4.People who let their kids climb on supermarket shelves.
    5. Anybody who leaves trash in shopping carts. (yeah I went food shopping today)
    6. Mothers who complain how much food costs, but their 13 year-old has a “Razor” cell phone.
    7. People who try to jump in front of you at the deli.
    8. People who drive Hummers but have no intention of driving off-road.
    9. Asshole Republicans.
    10. Husbands who only talk to you when you’re trying to type. :dead:

  35. justjim

    I never have any comments like these….. I’m just too perfect! :wtf:

  36. crazycanuck

    People who have enough time to write 11 comments.

  37. laceylegacey

    People who that think you should do everything for them and won’t do anything for you.
    Kids that won’t go bed so that you can have sex with you husband.
    People that won’t admit that you ARE perfect
    TATTLETALES!!!! 😡 😡 😡
    When the cat sneezes in your face.
    Annoying kids
    When your vaccum dies after the kids have drug in two tons of dirt and the cat has had a party in the litter box
    When someone bums a smoke off of you and then 10 minutes later you see them pull out a full pack.
    when you have a house full of people and one computer and THEY JUST WON’T SHARE!!! 👿
    When your husband claims to know all when he doesn’t and then won’t admit when YOU are right
    When you spend 3 hours cooking the perfect dinner and when he comes home all he wants is a sandwich.
    When he won’t tell you what he wants for dinner and when you decide on your own he asks why you didn’t make “this”.
    Finding your favorite song on the radio to have it go off 20 seconds later
    Looking forward to having something in paticular to eat when you get home and finding it gone and that someone left the empty box in the fridge just to tease you 😡 😡
    ( By the way I could probably go on with this forever!!!)
    When people don’t use their blinkers
    people who climb on the shelves in the grocery stores.
    Things that go “bump” in the night
    People who think ignorance is a virtue
    Lazy bosses
    Dumbass boses
    bosses in general
    Blondes who give other blondes a bad name
    People who use razor and don’t have the courtesy to rinse it out
    “Pain free” at home wax that isn’t
    :dead: :dead:
    Females that don’t shave their legs and insist on wearing shorts all year long
    Women who wear “short shorts” when their yhighs are so fat that the bottokm of the shorts roll up into their crotch :puke: :puke:
    Mustaches on women
    Jessica Simpson
    National Lampoon movies
    When you get done at the nail salon get 2 miles from the place and have ONE break or chip.
    When my Fat ass neighbor walks outside in her underwear ( even worse is whens shes in thongs and knocks on my door to “chat”)

  38. laceylegacey

    [Comment ID #24222 will be quoted here]
    Screw you
    :kiss: :kiss: :kiss:

  39. Buying topless sandals only to find out that my arch defect prevents them from sticking to my feet and my credit card is now being used by gnomes in Zurich. 🙄

  40. Having your boyfriend break up with you the day after Valentine’s Day. 👿

  41. aimmelou

    Watching the second graders come out of my son’s school listening to their IPods, and I can’t afford one.

  42. Thor

    Cashiers putting coin change on top of the bills and receipt.

  43. Steppenwolf

    Sorry to hear that Esther. 🙁
    Hopefully your photography will be therapeutic…love your pics!

  44. Goth Princess

    1. When people have food on their face and just don’t understand when you try to tell them.
    2. When you hear a song on the radio but the dumb ass DJ doesn’t tell you who its by or what its called and you have been trying to find out forever.
    3. When you look into a light and see colored spots floating in front of your face.
    4. When those weird streams of whatever slide down your eye, I mean what the hell is it.
    5. When people are singing and the really sound bad but think they sound good.
    6. Commercials you see with in about 5 minutes of the last time it aired.

  45. Natalie Cruz

    1. Knowing that somebody put a coke in the freezer, forgot about it, popped, and it was the last one, “it was of no use to anyone”.
    2. Eating a sack of walnuts, then biting into the last one which just happen to be bad, leaving a spoiled taste in your mouth.
    3. Going by drive thru, trying to ask the employee if they can put extra ketchup in the bag before the window closes, or they quickly look away trying to ignore you. You then get home and theirs not even a single pack of ketchup.
    4. When your x-boyfriend shows up to your house uninvited.

  46. Da Popster

    11. Women who bitch about that ONE TIME in 10,000 that you FORGOT to put the seat down. Just be glad we men don’t decide to grease the rim !!! 😈

  47. prtyprincess7104

    1) Stepping in dog poop after you just told your husband to let the damn dog out.
    2)Never having a head ache when you really need it
    3) Breaking the seal on a brand new pepsi and then dropping it on the floor before you even poured any in a glass.
    4)Washing clothes and finding a frog in your sons jeans
    5) Finding one sock in the dryer and you know you just washed two…maybe the dryer really ate it…? 💡

  48. prtyprincess7104

    JFLY you read my mind in number one

  49. Bjorn Freeh

    1. Sun visors in all American-made cars (105 years of production and they still can’t get the visor to cover the full length of the driver’s window)
    2. Windshield wipers (105 years of perfecting the eye-height streak)
    3. Idiots that cruise up on your tail, pass, pull in front of you and slow down
    4. Supreme idiots who slow down under the speed limit because they spot a cop
    5. Cops who drive 3 mph below the limit just to make traffic crawl
    6. DisneyWorld (ok, not exactly a small thing, but annoying as heck)
    7. People who slow down on dry pavement because they see snow on the grass alongside the road
    8. People with gas tank openings on the right side (read: wrong side) of the car pointing the wrong way at the pump
    9. Morons (members of the Morehead State University baseball team) who pound on the wrong motel room door at midnight
    10. People

  50. hippychick

    1. people(s) who actually see a state trooper cruising below the appointed speed limit and all 3 lanes are evenly cruising behind him and no one will pass. GRRR!
    2. People who insist on talking to you just 2 inches from your face with “dragon breath”.
    3. People who have websites bragging about their love life, then hatred toward that “loved one” when they don’t get what they want exactly out of the relationship and then asking their readers to feel sorry for them.
    4. Eating chicken soup with no pieces of chicken in it
    5. Doctors with cold-ass hands (Wash with warm water before)
    6. Parents who bring their whiney-ass kids shopping, to dinner to movies and don’t take them out.
    7. Kids who need to be bitch-slapped when talking disrespectfully to anyone else. Not just their elders.
    8. Going out dancing when some horney guy wants to come humpty-hump behind you when you already have a nice looking guy dancing with you. Hence the nice looking guy walks away thinking you let just anyonecome humpty-hump behind you.
    9. Guest at your home who leave maybe 2 drops of tea, milk, etc in the carton because they’re too lazy to throw it out.
    10. People who will over fill a trash can and not empty it.
    11. Shirts that fit everywhere except over my :boob: :boob: :wtf: Wow, I admitted that!

  51. Steph

    Anyone who refuses to control their terrible loud children

  52. Kinyou

    1. Talking to someone, then they accidentally spit, and that little drop of spit lands on your cheek, and you feel so obligated to wait until they finish their, what feels like, a speech-long conversation to wipe it off, or else you’ll feel as if you’ve offended them by wiping their spit off your face, as if you should feel honored it’s there or something.
    2. When you can’t get the dog smell off of a dog. For instance- You wash a dog, it smells like wet dog, the dog dries, it smell’s like dry dog once wet. It’s nasty.
    3. Talking to someone and have someone else listening butt into your conversation and start rambling on when you were talking, because something you said reminded them of something they had happened to them once, they just can’t wait until you’re done.
    4. Mexican’s (no offense) that literally throw themselves out the window’s of their cars, just to look at you for that split second it takes for them to drive by when you’re walking down the street. Don’t make it too obvious you’re looking at me, you might give yourself away. Is it an aphrodesiac? Come on.
    5. People constantly telling you that you’re wrong when you just KNOW that you aren’t, you get into an argument, usually in public, and soon to find out you actually were wrong, so you make a complete fool out of yourself in public, trying to cover up the fact that you can’t admit you were wrong. Ex: “I knew that”, “I was just testing you, haha…”
    6. All the names seem to be taken when you try to make an email or screen name for a website. You sit for about an hour and think of the most stupid name you can, and find out people really are as stupid as you, to have that one name that took you forever to think of.
    7. Anorexic-looking girls/women complaining that they’re fat infront of a big group of people, then looking around like their waiting for someone to say something along the lines of “oh my gosh! You so aren’t fat!” I want someone to just say, “Yeah you look like you’ve bee gaining some weight. You been eating more?” Then see what they say. Probably get all mad because that wasn’t the answer they wanted.
    8. People who hit their breaks when you honk at them. I want you to go faster dammit! Why are you breaking!!
    9. People who laugh, and you can’t help but notice that their tummies jiggle like a damn tidal-wave(sp?).
    10. People who are too conceited. I don’t like conceited people, but I can’t complain, if you’re confident about yourself, good for you, I’m glad you don’t whine about being ugly, but if you’re ugly, don’t display that you think you’re sexy or even remotely close. I’m sorry, but that makes me want to smack them.

  53. |nsan|ty

    I cant think of anything worse than Spuds comment..I am just glad I dont have his job 😕

  54. net-surfer22

    :wtf: 😕 to you poor guys, with little hairs in the back of tounge, theres only 3 (three) words for your spouse, “Shave It Please”.
    convienant store bathrooms. :wtf: ❓

  55. [Comment ID #24392 will be quoted here]

    Thanks. :kiss:

  56. starbugmama

    laceylegacey you read my mind

  57. Marilyn

    1. people who lie and don’t think you know that they are lying, but the faces they make makes it so obvious that they are lying!!!
    2. girls that wear pants a million sizes too small and their fat is hanging out from all sides!!!!!!! ewwwww!!!!!!!! :dead:
    man i love this website, i can rag on people and no one can give me shit!!!!!!!

  58. man i love this website, i can rag on people and no one can give me shit!!!!!!!

    That’s because only cool kids come here. We all love you. We only rag on those other people. 😈

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