Caption Time #263

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36 responses to “Caption Time #263”

  1. Meagan Avatar

    Great. Now I need to wash my eyes out before I go to bed. :wtf: :puke:

  2. Mandy Avatar

    is this your way of telling us you’re not buying us anything nice for xmas, dave? :dead:

  3. misterarthur Avatar

    Does this have something to do with the conservation of mass? Actually, I think the guy’s seeing if he won an instant new pants card from the Michigan Lottery.

  4. Phoenix1313 Avatar
    Phoenix1313

    Is that ass or back fat??? :puke:

  5. Russ Avatar
    Russ

    I think Mandy makes a much better plummer!

  6. cbatdux Avatar
    cbatdux

    He’s buying slim jims. I know it.

  7. Swankboy Avatar

    “Crack isn’t just for crackers any more.”

  8. Bear Avatar
    Bear

    surprised by his girlfriend’s husband, he grabbed the wrong pants when he went out the window…yeah she is also large but much shorter

  9. Garkitty Avatar
    Garkitty

    :puke: OMG Crack Kills!!!!!!! 😳

  10. Lung the Younger Avatar

    I really hope that there’s not another short-sighted customer with a swipe card around.

  11. StevieC Avatar

    The male version of the garter jeans.

  12. blips Avatar
    blips

    Sagging jeans are all the rage….too bad he didn’t think to put boxers on!

    “I haven’t gained weight! Why, I still wear the same size jeans I wore in kindergarten!”

  13. fruf Avatar
    fruf

    hmm I must buy a ham before Christmas
    If they are that far in the back ,where are they in the front ?
    I’ve got to go and wash out my mind

  14. tony Avatar
    tony

    Ok Dave!!!! Now none of us need play the lottery Today!!!!! Thanks!!!! ❓

  15. Timm Avatar
    Timm

    This is your ass.

    This is turbaconducken.

    This is your ass on turbaconducken.

  16. AnnieB Avatar

    [quote comment=”576855″]The male version of the garter jeans.[/quote]

    StevieC, her
    “cheeky” is looking really good now in comparison with King Kong’s…

    @ fruf… I’m with you, I shudder to think what the front might look like.

    @ Lung… LOL! 😛

  17. Patrick Avatar
    Patrick

    See, that’s what I’ve been trying to tell you. That’s what happens when you try to stuff twelve pounds of flour in a three pound bag. BUY SOME BIGGER JEANS YOU FAT BASTARD! I’ll take up a collection to start you off. Here’s $5.00 worth of grow the fuck up.

  18. StevieC Avatar

    Buttcrackin has pretty much killed my appetite for turduckin.

  19. Rebekca Avatar
    Rebekca

    [quote comment=”576855″]The male version of the garter jeans.[/quote]
    Nice call StevieC!

  20. Rebekca Avatar
    Rebekca

    “Does it feel a little breezy in here, or did I forget to pull up my pants again?” “Darn it all it’s my pants again.” 😥 :puke: :wtf: 😥

    Bleaching your eyes does work!!!!

  21. chainstay Avatar
    chainstay

    I’m too sexy for my jeans, too sexy for my jeans, too sexy!”

  22. Don Avatar
    Don

    Hey it’s Joe the plumber buying some lipstick for a pig

  23. Drusky Avatar
    Drusky

    Doesn’t the commercial for AM/PM say: “Too Much Good Stuff”…? :puke:

  24. Drusky Avatar
    Drusky

    [quote comment=”577161″][quote comment=”576855″]The male version of the garter jeans.[/quote]

    StevieC, her
    “cheeky” is looking really good now in comparison with King Kong’s…

    @ fruf… I’m with you, I shudder to think what the front might look like.

    @ Lung… LOL!

    :P[/quote]

    Except she cut hers up to get there. All he did is clench… ❗

  25. Sherri Avatar
    Sherri

    I think he’s smuggling a large breasted woman back there – what a cleavage!! :wtf:

  26. The Manticore Avatar

    ahhh. a typical Speedway customer.

  27. cbatdux Avatar
    cbatdux

    [quote comment=”577126″]This is your ass.

    This is turbaconducken.

    This is your ass on turbaconducken.[/quote]
    Winnah!

  28. Spud Avatar
    Spud

    So, if this guys farts, what’s stopping the egress of gas?

    Give up?

    Nothing.

    :dead:

  29. StevieC Avatar

    Merry Crackmas everyone!

  30. AlexBallew Avatar
    AlexBallew

    And we wonder why some cities wan tto ban low riding jeans in public. I bet he has a small dick too.

  31. Avalon Avatar
    Avalon

    I think he would flinch if you shot him with rock salt. Ready, Aim, Fire!!!

  32. Avalon Avatar
    Avalon

    Maybe he thinks he’s at the walk in clinic and is waiting for his weekly shot of penicillin

  33. Yankeerose32 Avatar
    Yankeerose32

    [quote comment=”578839″]And we wonder why some cities wan tto ban low riding jeans in public. I bet he has a small dick too.[/quote]
    LOL……I actually found somewhere………I an not really sure where, but for every 20lbs a guy is overweight, his “equipment” gets an inch shorter. I gotta Wonder…………..does this guy even have one left???? I bet he can’t find it!!!

  34. Dragonhose Avatar
    Dragonhose

    Hurry up you fuckin bitch, I need my twinkies and beef jerky, I’m gettin weak!!!

  35. LittleMissMeep Avatar
    LittleMissMeep

    This is the last shot of the wreckage that ensued after Mr. Big’s last living cousin leaned down on the counter. Survivors of the wreckage swore they’d felt an earthquake approaching… 👿 😛

  36. robot Avatar
    robot

    H. O. T.

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