Your seed must leave your hand

1. Spud

   24 August, 2007, 3:18 am

   ahem, cough, … oh god, you devil.

2. Lung the Younger

   24 August, 2007, 3:31 am

   See, even God thinks mathematicians are a bunch of wankers.

3. Spud

   24 August, 2007, 3:37 am

   They have their +’s and -‘s

4. Chris S

   24 August, 2007, 6:59 am

   I prefer to use one of those push from behind spreaders…

5. CBATDUX

   24 August, 2007, 8:19 am

   OH my GOD! It’s an anagram. It really says “Give me all your money. I must sleep with your wife.”

6. Cindy

   24 August, 2007, 8:25 am

   Yeah, usually in a tissue…. 😛

7. Fellow Eskimo

   24 August, 2007, 8:44 am

   And I grew up in good ole’ Goldsboro…

8. The Natural EMP

   24 August, 2007, 9:36 am

   Sesame seed, watermelon seed, pumpkin seed? I’m so confused. :wtf:

9. misterarthur

   24 August, 2007, 10:08 am

   Your seed must enter the furrow.

10. Astryd

    24 August, 2007, 10:20 am

    To bring multiplcation, your seed must leave your hand.
    …but not onto her chest, face, mouth, her hands, stomach, back, thighs, feet, etc.
    (although it may be fun, you will be left without multiplication to solve) 😆

11. Buck

    24 August, 2007, 10:36 am

    Clariss Starling and Multiple Miggs agree :wang:

12. Meagan

    24 August, 2007, 11:16 am

    Yet multiple hands make for much fun! 😈

13. AnnieB

    24 August, 2007, 2:29 pm

    I’m all for planting seeds just as long as there is crop failure. 😛

14. Marcus

    24 August, 2007, 2:48 pm

    You reap what you sow. Be careful where you plant your seed and how many times you plant. :wtf:

15. Pablo

    24 August, 2007, 2:54 pm

    Dang, the church is everywhere.

    The biggest problem I’ve seen is that after the seed is sown, alot of people don’t want to stay on the farm. Yeah plowing is fun, but raising a crop is hard work. Hence the video of the day.

16. Kenny (CreativeJournal.net)

    24 August, 2007, 3:08 pm

    wait, is the funny part what the sign says or that the pastor’s first name is Mintus?

17. Loli

    24 August, 2007, 3:15 pm

    Ah, I always was bad at math…

18. Mikeme

    24 August, 2007, 4:01 pm

    Oh cum all ye faithfull! :wang: :wang:

19. Randy

    24 August, 2007, 4:25 pm

    If at first the hand does not succeed, then try, try again; otherwise, suck until you do seed.

20. Bigwavdave

    24 August, 2007, 7:25 pm

    [Comment ID #199078 will be quoted here]

    Right on the money as usual…

    And finally: “Sometimes to get the job done right, you got to handle it yourself…”

21. Flash Gordon

    24 August, 2007, 9:12 pm

    There’s a lot to be said for Onanism, especially if
    your main squeeze has departed. 🙄 :limp: 👿 😈 :wtf:

22. Spud

    24 August, 2007, 9:36 pm

    dada tish boom… we’ll be here all week, try the crab.

23. chainstay

    24 August, 2007, 11:41 pm

    The song goes, “Every sperm is sacred, every sperm is good, every sperm is needed in your neighborhood.” Thank you Monty Python.

24. StevieC

    25 August, 2007, 10:05 am

    One in the hand is worth two in the bush sounds more like addition than multiplication to me.

25. Jayne

    25 August, 2007, 10:32 am

    Hahahaha… oh this is hilarious.

    First time here… will definitely be coming back!

26. Janet

    25 August, 2007, 1:08 pm

    [Comment ID #199063 will be quoted here]

    So, you like taking it up the ‘backside’, spread wide???

27. Janet

    25 August, 2007, 1:10 pm

    Poppy seed you do it behind the shed, and with the sheep in the field! 😛

28. Janet

    25 August, 2007, 1:12 pm

    [Comment ID #199084 will be quoted here]

    Did you mean “suck” seed? Yee haw!

29. Brad K.

    25 August, 2007, 1:25 pm

    Jack drove through the small town enjoying the sights. His new job at Acme Hardware was a significant increase in responsibility for the young married man. Jack’s interest in how various rural communities coped with Dutch Elm Disease, and the various sub-strains of Oak that seemed to emerge from the bio-isolation of farming communities make this little village seem exciting and a wonderful resource. Stopping at the burger drive-in, his wife Rosie had found a job with one of the local adult book stores, and they had met both daughters of the local school principal. The school system seemed great and the people had been quite welcoming. It was a bit surprising, really, that so many people knew that Jack would be assistant manager in the plumbing supplies department of the second biggest hardware store in a community of 1200 people..

    While enjoying the trees and learning the streets, Jack and Rosie came upon the strangest site. A store-front type church, apparently. Right next to Rosie’s new employer, ‘Priscilla’s Toys & Things/Must be 18 to Enter’, was this ‘Higher Elevation Ministries’. Only it looked like a strip club or bar. And shared space with the ‘book’ store. Hmm.

    Then Rosie explained what her boss had told her. The ‘faith’ appearance got 25% reduction in taxes, ‘donations’ weren’t reported as tips. And each Saturday they held a Wanker contest, judging on distance of the ‘happy ending’. Thus, the artillery-like allusion to ‘higher elevation’.

    This week the theme of the contest was the ever-popular ‘splatter’ quotient, where the number and dimensions of smears on the stage were used to determine the most ‘attractive’ dancer. Er, accolyte.

    Rosie reported that the ‘janitor’ was this old guy that wasn’t allowed within 1/2 mile of the school, and worked during the performances. He seemed to be the most consistent winner, and had three wives.

30. Drusky

    25 August, 2007, 8:56 pm

    What happens if your hand falls asleep on you, too?

31. Astryd

    27 August, 2007, 10:46 am

    [Comment ID #199132 will be quoted here]

    Learn to use the other one.

Comments are closed