I’m sorry, what was the question?

1. rust

   13 July, 2005, 1:12 am

   A penguin bumps into a midget prostitute on his way out of a Tim Horton’s one night and asks her if she has some advice to use with his frigid spouse.

   She tells him that if he’s going to get anywhere with her, he’ll have to do what the baker does with the dough before deep frying.

   The penguin goes home, does the nasty and meets the prostitute the next evening outside the same Tim Horton’s with a load of Timbits under his wing.

   “You were right! All I needed was to plug up her bunghole with a wad of bills and she went right down on me!”

   (add punchline here)

2. Spud

   13 July, 2005, 2:10 am

   What can I say, it’s just brilliant! all 3 contributions make it is what it is.

   Brilliant!

   😈

3. Dante

   13 July, 2005, 2:18 am

   (Can you change it to ‘Dee Evans’? It just looks cooler! :kiss:)

   So there’s this penguin that has a bet with a midget prostitute that he can spell out sentences with donuts. The prostitue asks him how the hell he can do such a thing. So he grabs dozens of packets of Krispy Kremes and lays them on the ground all at once, arranging each letter to for a long sentence.

   [punchline].

   (Yeah, I know it was a bad joke, but it’s pretty good for 11:00 at night and I’m tired; so there! :razz:)

4. Lung the Younger

   13 July, 2005, 4:14 am

   So, this penguin and this midget woman are lining up in the street for an audition for the new Broadway musical adaptation of ‘My Left Foot’. The penguin starts to flirt with the little lady given that she’s the only chick he’s ever met that he can actually measure up to.

   Trying to impress her he says “You know, where I come from I’m considered and emperor, cha-chang!”. She shrugs. He tries again. “You know, so many casting agents have told me to take a flying fuck at a rolling donut that I reckon I could do it blindfolded”. Unimpressed she replies “Well actually I used to be in the ‘business’ so to speak and I reckon you’re talking through your hat.”

   Daunted but unable to back down the penguin marches to the nearest café and comes back with a greasy paper bag. After ten minutes of acrobatics, the penguin is covered with jello, there’s sugar all over the sidewalk and the rest of the audition queue are applauding.

   …………

5. Mandy

   13 July, 2005, 6:20 am

   :wtf:

6. CJ

   13 July, 2005, 8:32 am

   A midget prostitute and a penguin are in line at the Krispy Kreme. The prostitute orders the last dozen of glazed donuts. THe penguin proceeds to follow her and picks her up for a quick trick. He drives her to a desolate spot to “complete the transaction”. After he finsihes he kills her and pushes her corpse out of the car. As he drives off……punchline….

7. Merth

   13 July, 2005, 10:18 am

   Favorite responses:
   “Do others know you find that attractive? I am betting no…”
   “Ahhh. That is filthy. (pause) I like filthy.”

   😎

8. Minnie

   13 July, 2005, 11:00 am

   A penguin who likes to bake and a midget woman work in a circus together. Being short (pun unintended) of cash, the woman decides to solicit herself. In her most provocative voice she asks the penguin, “How about a ride? I need the dough.”

   The penguin hears that as “knead the dough.” So…

   (insert punchline)

9. Esther

   13 July, 2005, 11:30 am

   A penguin and a midget prostitute, holding a box of doughnuts, walk into a bar.

   (punchline)

   😛

10. Dante

    13 July, 2005, 3:37 pm

    There’s this midget prostitute that has a donut addiction and is trying to think of how to stop. A penguin tells her to just throw out all her donuts, but the prostitute can’t. The penguins tells her “then I’ll do it!”

    (punchline)

11. Minnie

    13 July, 2005, 3:53 pm

    Haha. Brilliant, Dante! 😆

12. Mandy

    13 July, 2005, 4:16 pm

    These jokes make my bra itch.

13. Spud

    13 July, 2005, 7:37 pm

    Well? take it off…

    let those puppies run free

    😈

14. DK

    13 July, 2005, 8:50 pm

    Dave, Dave, Dave… tsk, tsk. 🙄

15. JFLY

    13 July, 2005, 11:49 pm

    Reminded me of a joke told by Ronnie Wood:

    Two hungover guys go to the local convent and ask to speak to Mother Superior.

    First guy: Do you have any midget nuns here?

    Mother Superior: Heavens, no!

    First guy: You’re absolutely sure? I was a bit drunk last night, but I know I met a midget nun and this is the only convent around here….

    Mother Superior: My son, I am quite familiar with all of the sisters here…..I assure you, there is no midget nun here.

    Second guy: See? I told you – you fucked a penguin!!!

    😛

16. JFLY

    13 July, 2005, 11:51 pm

    And Dave – that oughta teach you to encourage bad jokes…..

    😀

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