DIY Hints You Should Probably Ignore

Need to liven up the office Xmas party? Photoshop your coworkers' heads into pictures from questionable websites and you've got a slideshow everyone will be talking about! Use Strontium-90 to soothe a colicky baby. Old Ethernet cables make great leashes for the elderly! Use "Swiffer" sheets to quickly erase your sibling's homework. Worried about what your kids are texting? Change all the phone numbers of their besties in their phone's contact list to the local police's number. Hilarity ensues. Rub butter on a sunburned, old man to roast him faster. Use a roll of tin foil to silence a nosy…

How to sit through an all-day meeting

8:00AM: Listen attentively. Take fastidious notes that would put a science reporter to shame. 9:00AM: Tap chin with pen while slightly lifting brows to appear highly engrossed. 10:00AM: Take a relaxed sidelong glance at the clock for no reason. Notice a thirst developing. 10:15AM: Finally let out for a 15 minute break. Crack a joke about bladder control with coworker, grab another coffee and cringe when team leader says time's up. 11:38PM: Stare incessantly at clock waiting for lunch hour. 12:00PM: Turn white-faced in horror when team leader announces that we should "really go till 12:30 to get through as…