Recent Effluvia:

English Teacher Pickup Lines

1. Care to split my infinitive?
2. What’s an antonym for virginity?
3. That’s quite a dangling modifier you’ve got there.
4. I love the way you misuse the subjunctive, you naughty little minx.
5. You always know how to find the predicate in my clause.
6. Let me be the first to complement your subject.
7. Show me your direct object and I’ll show you mine.
8. You can take my infinitive object; with or without actors!
9. Tell me all about your past progressive.
10. You certainly know how to use other tenses in conjunction with simple tenses.

1. Disney’s Waco on Ice
2. Herpes! The Musical
3. Bowling for Porcupine
4. Mark Foley’s Bedtime Stories for Kids
5. G.G. Allin Easter Special
6. Pixar presents: The Mediocres
7. The Creators of Stomp! bring you: Squish
8. A Very Cthulhu Christmas
9. The Spleen Monologues
10. Which shows do you want to avoid?