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- Ask your nurse for some apple juice. Pour it into a urine specimen jar. Nonchalantly walk down the aisles, sipping it.
- After an operation on [some body part], wake up from the anesthesia and ask, “So how is my [unrelated body part]?”
- Schedule gurney races down the hallways of ER. Try to beat EMTs with critical patients. Bonus points for having racing stripes, flames or real exhaust.
- Ask the nurse for a cocktail umbrella and fruit for your urine sample. You know, to make it look Klassy.
- When you wake up from anesthesia, pretend to speak a different language. Look at everyone as evil foreigners.
- Scream down the hallways that “They’ve taken my liver! I went to a party and woke up here, with no liver.”
- If the nurse gives you a choice for lunch, ask if they have Soylent Green.