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- Whenever magic is being performed for the first time, black clouds instantly roll in.
- If a cop or some para-military soldier pokes at his own eyes, then forwards twice in the air, trouble is coming.
- Giants and large dinosaurs move in slow motion. Small dinosaurs move with lightning speed.
- In real life, putting up your open palm signals someone to stop. In the movies, this is how Native Americans greet each other.
- In real life, putting up your closed fist means Black Power. In the movies, this is how Ninjas signal each other to stop.
- Women have always worn thongs, even in the Renaissance.
- The first time a werewolf transforms, it will take up an entire chapter on a DVD and involve painful screaming. Subsequent transformations take only seconds and are painless.
- If a sea monster is large enough to eat your ship, it will.
- Giant snakes will feed 6-10 times a day, every day, rather than resting a month between meals.
- All Eastern European grandfathers hunted witches. All Eastern European grandmothers are witches.