Things I Learned from Movies, Serial Killers

If you inherit a mansion, it will be haunted by a murderous ghost. You will not be notified of this until at least three people with you have died. If your family owns a cabin, it will be in an area far from civilization, off a road that never made it to any map. Teenage sex attracts serial killers and cannibals. If you stab a serial killer, you will only be able to stab him just above the collarbone—an area that neither hurts him, not affects his ability to use his arm. While the skin of a serial killer can…