Photo of a reader's books on a table, by freestocks on Unsplash

Dank and Blight’s Elements of Style for Today’s Reader

Chapter One Times have changed. The attention span of today's reader is known to be slightly less than that of a Junebug. As such, the volume of text required has lessened substantially. The amount of copy required to produce a meme is, in today's world, sufficient for a technical whitepaper. The reader is, simply put, an imbecile. You will have to find a way to live with that. Assume everything you write will be comprehended as if read to a fourteen-year-old, Dutch cat with severe hearing loss. You won't be far off. Today's readers (if they can be referred to…

Bigfoot will invest in your pyramid scheme

Love this! Each State’s Most Embarrassing Google Searches. My state of Michigan's searches were: MICHIGAN: Bigfoot evidence / pyramid scheme / Little Caesars (pizza chain) / Lou Bega—Mambo No. 5 (A Little Bit Of) Analysis: If you can lure Bigfoot out of the woods with pizza and catchy songs you can probably convince him to invest in your pyramid scheme. Curious what type of searches I'll get after posting this.