Caption Time #94

1. Mistress Lily

   30 January, 2006, 12:20 am

   :wtf: I would kill the person who snapped this….. 😛 I think she should lay off the ice cream for a while too….. I think the dog is a bit ashamed…..ROTF

   The art of nitting….someone has waaaaaaaay too much time on their hands. 😆

2. Spud

   30 January, 2006, 12:35 am

   Wha ………..aaaaaaat !!!!!
   Shut the fuck up !!!!!!
   It’s only a half gallon tub !!!!!!

   😳

3. Minnie

   30 January, 2006, 12:49 am

   Happy Birthday! :kiss: 😀

4. Kami

   30 January, 2006, 12:56 am

   Happy Birthday Dave. :java: :kiss:

   If it weren’t for that container of ice cream, one might mistake that white stuff around her mouth for something else. . . 😳 What a pig.

5. Susan

   30 January, 2006, 1:01 am

   I’ll show YOU some PopoZao, K-Fed!

6. Spud

   30 January, 2006, 1:12 am

   Two more things…

   1. Hippy happy birthday Dave
   2. About that knitting… an awful lot of impaling going on…

   😈

7. |nsan|ty

   30 January, 2006, 1:22 am

   damn…… 😕 what the,,,,,!?!…… some people should not be allowed to …….. ah hell, I aint gonna say what that reallllllly looks like.

8. |nsan|ty

   30 January, 2006, 1:23 am

   Ok… I will… she looks like shes going to attack the person coming after her ice cream…..and serious as hell about it…. some ones gonna lose and arm, or an eye!

9. Kismet

   30 January, 2006, 1:54 am

   She’s even eating it with an ice cream scoop. Damn.

   At least you know she’d never get snowed in during a blizzard.

10. Master Solace

    30 January, 2006, 1:59 am

    Three things

    1: Since I’m a newer patron to this site, I did not know…so Dave, Happy Birthday from me as well.

    2: She’s got that look on her face like she could inflict pain on someone with that ice cream scoop(orally, anally, or otherwise).
    :dead:

    3: And shouldn’t she be wearing a bigger napkin is she’s gonna eat the whole thing?!? 👿

11. larfus

    30 January, 2006, 3:31 am

    “3: And shouldn’t she be wearing a bigger napkin is she’s gonna eat the whole thing?!?”

    I think thats a table cloth 🙄

12. marcus

    30 January, 2006, 3:32 am

    Cheers to Dave and Happy Birthday 😀

    Caption Time. “Melinda the stripper performed at Dave’s Birthday Party. The routine was called “Eating Ice Cream with a Scoop” during the number she slapped Dave with her belly fat.” :wtf: 😆 :limp:

13. Lung the Younger

    30 January, 2006, 3:37 am

    The Olsen twins before mitosis occurred.

    (although looking closely, that face does not match the body and the upper arms and shoulders don’t match the forearms. The lady is padded methinks)

    Link: Knitting is obviously the new basket weaving.

14. Wendyfb

    30 January, 2006, 3:49 am

    Maybe her family took this picture in hopes to “scare her straight” into losing weight… a picture is worth a thousand words… or is that a thousand calories? 😈

15. Wendyfb

    30 January, 2006, 3:51 am

    And by the way, that knitting… wow.. theres some serious talent there! Its not easy knitting like that.. it just scares me as to the title of the picture…”beautiful??????”

16. mitch

    30 January, 2006, 6:14 am

    Happy Birthday, Dave….why the picture of an food-mad Rosie O’Donnell? I thought she was dead.

17. Dennis Bookhart

    30 January, 2006, 6:22 am

    “Don/t even try an take it away unless you want to lose a few bodily appendages!

18. Ben

    30 January, 2006, 6:26 am

    What? Its low in rush! 🙄 ok that was stupid. (rush=fat) did ANYBODY laugh? ok good. me neither.

19. Spud

    30 January, 2006, 6:38 am

    Rather large caption…

    “Maitre D: And finally, madame, a wafer-thin mint.

    Mrs Creosote: No.

    Maitre D: Oh sir! It’s only a tiny little thin one.

    Mrs Creosote: No. Fuck off – I’m full… [Belches]

    Maitre D: Oh madame… it’s only *wafer* thin.

    Mrs Creosote: Look – I couldn’t eat another thing. I’m absolutely
    stuffed. Bugger off.

    Maitre D: Oh madamer, just… just *one*…

    Mrs Creosote: Oh all right. Just one.

    Maitre D: Just the one, madame… voila… bon appetit…”

    :puke:

20. Craig

    30 January, 2006, 6:46 am

    Nice christmas sweater. Take that fuckin’ dog for a walk. 😈

21. cbatdux

    30 January, 2006, 7:25 am

    Dog, to woman: Get the HELL off my back, you lard ass!

    Actually, she is on a diet. I recognize the container. It’s not ice cream, It’s Jimmy Dean’s diet ice-lard made from sausage drippins.

    Happy Birthday Mon Capitan! Do we send presents or just sing loudly and off-key?

22. Nikki

    30 January, 2006, 7:41 am

    Happy Birthday, Dave. :kiss:

23. Wendy

    30 January, 2006, 7:46 am

    I didnt know beached whales could survive out of water with ugly sweaters and a tub of ice cream.

    As for the knitting…gotta love the S&M setup in pink! (God forbid the beached whale try any of that on!)

    And I didn’t know either till now, but Happy Birthday, Dave!!

24. Aunt Stacy

    30 January, 2006, 8:04 am

    Happy Birthday!

    Is she riding that dog? (poor thing)

    the website…. spellcheck is all I have to say

25. Fran

    30 January, 2006, 8:52 am

    This is a posed photo because any serious ice cream eater knows that an ice cream scoop is not the best tool to use. A large serving spoon or reinforced tablespoon is best. 😛

26. Tami Jo

    30 January, 2006, 8:55 am

    It’s only because I love you, brother o’ mine.

27. Anita Mann-Badley

    30 January, 2006, 9:01 am

    Wow, 14 sweaters and I still get brain-freeze. Maybe I should try something else. I know… mittens!

28. Bjorn Freeh

    30 January, 2006, 9:04 am

    Unless that’s butter pecan ice cream, her boyfriend should get down to the clinic pretty soon.

29. Craig

    30 January, 2006, 9:36 am

    “We’ll get to your walk in a bit, momma hears another tub of double chocolate chip callin’ her name.” :limp:

30. Patrick

    30 January, 2006, 9:42 am

    The dog is alerting her to the fact that the pizza man is coming up the drive but he’s a little bit slow and she just couldn’t wait. Dessert before dinner, yum, good munching!

31. Coley

    30 January, 2006, 10:20 am

    First of all, not to steal a page from Master’s book, but I too am rather new. Therefore, I was unaware it was the big cheese’s birthday. That being said, Happy Birthday Dave!

    Secondly, does anyone else think this photo is staged? She has a very small head for that big overstuffed body. Also, who eats ice cream out of the container with the scoop, but takes the time and concern to put on a bib? Not likely.

32. Da Popster

    30 January, 2006, 10:46 am

    That dog better not be hoping for any “fall out”, looks like it’s gonna be disapointed.
    ❓

33. Other April

    30 January, 2006, 10:50 am

    Is anyone else thinking “Avaaaaalanche”?

34. bran

    30 January, 2006, 11:34 am

    happy birthday, Dave. 🙂

35. Esther

    30 January, 2006, 12:45 pm

    Happy Birthday, you magnificent bastard! :kiss:

36. Lace Valentine

    30 January, 2006, 1:59 pm

    Happy Birthday Dave. Too bad she ate the ice cream. Cake may still be available, unless the dog got to it.

37. rust

    30 January, 2006, 2:23 pm

    aw c’mon, give her a break. Obviously she was giving sweetums his daily dose of “Rocky Road” when some one with a camera surprised her. I can’t think of anything more innocent.

    Oh, and that cream on her lips came from her dog. He just gave her an ice-cream covered kiss…

38. MrDoug

    30 January, 2006, 2:43 pm

    Brenda Sue the double above the knee amputee demonstrates her new exercise program, “Scooping to the oldies”. As for the dog he goes by the name, “Kill me now for the love of god”

    I hope tomorrows list is what master Dave got for his birthday. Happy Birthday old man!

39. Master Solace

    30 January, 2006, 2:46 pm

    [Comment ID #20817 Will Be Quoted Here]

    Then I think she may need a bigger table…er…table cloth.

    And I didn’t notice the dog at first, porr thing, SHE SAT ON HIM!!! I think we need to report her to the ASFDA—the Association for Sickenly Flattened Domestic Animals, because simply WHERE IS THE BACK END OF THE DOG!!! Forget the ASFDA, I will send my EVIL WERE-RABBITS OF DOOOOOM!!!!! her way.

    Sorry about the were-rabbits, I felt I had neglected them.

40. Colin

    30 January, 2006, 3:42 pm

    “Becky knew that if she trained hard enough and really worked at it, she’d be able to win gold at next year’s special olympics…”

    *ducks*

41. franklito

    30 January, 2006, 4:36 pm

    “i KNOW you aint askin for none”
    “oh! was this yours”
    “what I cant have no after, after dinner snack?!”
    “Dont make me smack you with this.. you know i hate to waste good food.”
    “I.. I.. Think … I cant eat no more….. Nah weres the other one.”
    “who says i cant have the whole thing? you aint buy it!”
    “will you still love me if i was fat?”
    “oh babes when im done with this, your next”
    “just cause i eat like this, is not why im fat, im just big boned stupid”
    “shut up you know you want some… here”
    “nothin gets me hotter than a gallon of ice cream, oh yes baby”

42. franklito

    30 January, 2006, 4:42 pm

    happy b-day dave, hope they got the pretty strippers this time and not the midget clan, or the hippo humpers. any ways ill smoke one for ya 😛

43. dougieace

    30 January, 2006, 7:28 pm

    after a half gallon of ice cream, buddy the lab knows it will be time for his treat peanut butter .

44. Jane

    30 January, 2006, 10:09 pm

    CAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Gimmie!!!!!!!!!!! 😮

45. JFLY

    30 January, 2006, 11:15 pm

    Happy Birthday, Dave!!! (…be sure to give him spankings, Nikki)

    And I’m LMAO at Lung the Younger, cbatdux, and Master Solace…

    My caption: “Whaaaaat? I’m on the Atkin’s Diet…”

46. Ace

    31 January, 2006, 4:18 am

    “I am on a diet! This here is my reward.”
    How lady-like, she is using her “napkin” as a bib. Looks like finnishing school really paid off.
    Happy Birthday Dave!

47. cody

    31 January, 2006, 8:49 am

    dunno if that’s the woman you want to share your birthday with if she hogs all the ice cream. (that’s alright though because i think that cake taste better anyway.)
    have a good one, mr.dave

48. Peg

    31 January, 2006, 11:00 am

    “I don’t know how I got into the wicked witches house, but she’s holding me hostage. Hansel, Grettle, help!!! I’ll be going into the oven real soon.”

49. Jay Jay

    31 January, 2006, 11:02 am

    yo, that is one fat bitch.

50. family jules

    31 January, 2006, 5:01 pm

    Let me guess, her boyfriend ticked her off when she was having a mad PMS attack, and then the a$$hole had the nerve to take this pic and post it on the internet. His funeral will be on Tuesday.

51. Paige

    31 January, 2006, 8:49 pm

    fat girls gone wild. Love the fact that shes eating it with the scoop!!! :dead:

52. Master Solace

    01 February, 2006, 1:24 am

    Me thinks me got two more captions:

    “MMMmmmm……creamy!!!”

    “Rover, wheel me over there so I can shove this scoop down his throat!!!”

    Used together or seperately, they get the point across. Or, so to speak, smear the cream across the face!!! 😈

53. tinamarie

    01 February, 2006, 9:09 pm

    Look at the hands people–that has GOT to be a man’s body with a woman’s head photoshopped on. It just isn’t possible for her face to be that thin with a body that large (and no neck, and huge hands, and…)

    It’s just wrong. All wrong.

54. SamDi

    02 February, 2006, 2:07 am

    Does this woman frighten anyone but me?

55. juliebeanpie

    05 February, 2006, 8:44 pm

    what do you mean, its nonfat?

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