Girls kick ass. Even in space
It seems that women are better equipped to withstand the rigors of space flight than men. No surprise that. Most studies prove women live longer, handle stress better and survive alone better. But what makes women better at space travel? I think science fiction has all the answers we need.
It could very well be that the metal bras and g-strings so often seen in sci-fi flicks protect the female body better than full space suits. While their wimpy male counterparts require extensive body armor that covers all but their face, space chicks need but a comfortable gargoyle-shaped steel bra, thigh-high vinyl boots and a dowdy, conservative thong. Apparently, female gluteals are able to survive a zero-g environment unencumbered by those confining trousers and coveralls.
Optional fashion accessories may include puny ray guns, electronic bracelets that fire “beams” and distinctly uncool communication devices. (Cell phones are phased out in the future)
In space, no one can see your lip gloss
Time after time, television, comics and movies have shown us. A woman’s skin can repel anything from laser attacks to sub-zero temperatures to Arcturan torture devices and still come out looking freshly bathed mere minutes after hour-long battles with all-male bands of over-sexed reptoids.
Break a sweat? Never. Today’s modern space grrl has mastered Tae Kwon Do, Drunken Chipmunk style Kung Fu and jello-wrestling. She can easily defeat the screaming hordes of nasty proto-hominids and come out looking fresh as a daisy with nary a tousled lock.
So it’s either the steel bra or the inevitable sex scene with the ship’s Alpha Male captain that account for this girl’s pluckiness and unswerving determination to save men from themselves.
See? Girls kick ass.
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