Lies clients (still) tell freelancers

  1. “When we go IPO, your cut will be huge.”
  2. “This is the kind of project that will make your career. You can practically write your own future after this.”
  3. “I need you to do me a solid on this one. I know it’s a nothing budget and the turnaround time is physically impossible, but this will lead to so many more jobs. I’m already picturing you running all our brands someday.”
  4. “I never got your signed contract in the mail.” “I signed it in front of you. I have a copy right here.” “That’s fake. I never signed that. I don’t even know who you are.”
  5. “It’s OK to use her soundtrack in my video. I have the rights to every song Beyoncé ever wrote.”
  6. “There’s no such thing as copyright infringement on the internet. Everything is stolen.”
  7. “I’m pretty sure—like 99.99% sure my lawyer cleared us to use Oprah’s work.”
  8. “PayPal must be slow. My account got hacked once and now it takes like um, 53 more days to clear. For security! This protects both of us. You get it. You’re smart.”
  9. “We did tons of user testing on this bad boy.”
  10. “I sent the check yesterday. Our mail doesn’t always get picked up from our office.”