Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: You wouldn’t know. It’s a really obscure number. Q: How do you drown a hipster? A: Force…
My Asshole Cats …Refuse to chase their toys until I’m in 4th stage REM sleep. …Only get nauseous when the floor is clean. And only on the hardwood. …Are responsible…
Thank you for your patience! Your AT&T Representative will be with you shortly. Welcome! You are now chatting with 'Vanessa' Vanessa: Hi David, Thanks for chatting, let me help you…
If it seems contrary to common sense, you're either about to die a redneck death, or have an innovative breakthrough.
—Davezilla
So I became a father for the first time. At 49. I had pretty much given up the hope of having children, but then it happened. No, don't congratulate me.…
Amazon claims it will use flying robot drones to deliver packages to us in the near future. Sorry, USPS. You've been replaced. Perhaps this is smart thinking on Amazon's part…
When people say, "Oh, it's just for the time being," I freak out. We have Time Beings that demand offerings from us? When did this start? Next thing, you'll be…
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