Month: March 2005

It was the third Wednesday of the month and that meant the department was having its monthly lunch at the Boobatorium. It isn’t really called that. It’s sort of a poor man’s Hooters. The typical sports bar you’d see in any town, except that the waitresses wear less than many swimsuit models. Our waitress’s breasts […]

You have two cats. Each cat weighs about 8 pounds. Each cat eats 1/2 pound of dry food per week, Each cat also has its own litterbox with 20 pounds of litter. When you go to change the litterboxes, the litter in each box weighs 38 pounds. How is this possible? viagra free viagra buy […]

Last night, the lovely Natalie and I had dinner with the adorably witty Melissa and her charming husband, Logan. Those two are quite a pair and kept us laughing all night. Her retelling of the evening is far better than I could do, so please read her version. She includes an excellent description of our […]

Phyllis Glabstrubber. Phyllis Glabstrubber. American. Bunions are acting up again. The glasses help smelling flowers. Never paying $4.95 for a lousy paperback again. Bra is too tight. Dying for a Virginia Slims 100. Nope, don’t like the Pepsi Clear, either. Call that a dog? Damn kids. Toilet papered the trees again last night. Shoe’s coming […]

Dear Heavyset, You sat next to me in the first class section of flight 427 this evening. I wasn’t ruffled when you accidentally dropped your lead-filled carry-on bag on my crotch. I stifled a scream when you dropped your styrofoam cup of scalding decaf on my kneecap. I resisted the urge to break your pinky […]

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